#but maybe later. ughhhh for now i just have to suck it up and watch it for what it is and do my assignment

[torchickentacos]

[jishyucks]

Happy Holidays! The Universe Hates Me. — hrj

‣ pairing: huang renjun x reader

‣ genre: fluff, academic-rivals-to-(implied)lovers, forced proximity, kinda slice-of-life

‣ wc: 3.7k

‣ summary: You don’t hate many things, but you could proudly say that you hate snow and Huang Renjun. And now that the universe has decided that it was a great idea to have you snowed in with the smartass himself, you’ll gladly add the universe to that list.

‣ warnings: slightly one-sided rivalry (more so Renjun’s developed feelings before reader so he’s acting on it before reader even gets what they’re feeling), the pair eat some cup ramen, set in that weird period where they dk how they feel

‣ an: I rly thought this was going to be easy to write but sike (⊙_⊙) ig its bc its basically e2l and these r difficult to write,, I was excited to write Renjun's but idk if I did my own idea justice,, anyways I hope it's still a fun read!

Series Masterlist

You’ve never been so nervous for a final in your life.

Sure, you didn’t find the content difficult, nor did you feel lost. Hell, if you were asked to explain the content with no aids, you can confidently do it. 

The only reason why you were so nervous for a damn final was because you knew that Huang Renjun was going to do better than you. Why? You’re not sure. But you had this gut feeling that his name was going to be listed right above yours on that stupid list and you were not going to let that happen. 

“You need to go home soon, okay?” Karina frowns. She’s all bundled up, a scarf tightly wrapped over her face to shield her from Jack Frost. She knows how much of a workaholic you were, especially when it came to Renjun, “It’s getting late. It’s already dark out and there’s no one else here. Text me when you get home.”

You nod, “I will, I promise. I’ll just finish this last lesson and then I’ll leave. I’m hungry, anyway.” 

Her stern expression softens underneath her scarf and she teasingly ruffles your hair, “Talk to you later, honeybun.” 

You wave and watch her leave before turning back to the scattered papers in front of you, your laptop burning holes in your eyes because you’ve been staring at it for way longer than a physician’s recommendation. The final was on physics, something that wasn’t your strongest suit. It was probably because the way your teachers decided to word the questions on exams screwed you over—but then again, you couldn’t blame your struggles on that. 

Maybe you did just suck at physics. 

Your eyes scanned the lesson you were currently studying, quietly reading it under your breath so that you could process the information—critical threshold… velocity… laminar to turbulent… fluid and momentum… the dissipation of energy…

“Ughhhh!” 

Your heart drops to your stomach, eyes almost slipping out of their sockets at the sound of another person groaning. You clearly remember Karina just saying that there wasn’t anyone else here. 

Then who in the actual fuck…

Your mind jumps to conclusions and thinks up the worst-case scenario. It could be a ghost… were you Scrooge and the ghosts here to visit you? No fucking way… you loved Christmas… Or it could be a murderer. But what kind of murderer groans before he reaches his target?

Using this as an excuse to procrastinate, you quietly push your chair away from the table and stand up. You can recall that the groaning echoed from the back of the library, so you begin making your way down to the back of the room. Your attempt to keep your footsteps quiet, barely lifting them off from the ground.

You guess you were making your way in the correct direction because now you can hear the sound of muffled music. You suppose it was coming out of the other person’s headphones. 

As you approach the end of one of the aisles of books, you bend over and peek through the cracks between the books. Your eyes betray you, not focusing on the figure sitting at one of the tables because the books are in the way. Leaning closer, you squint to get a better look at the figure studying, head bopping to the music blaring through their headphones. 

Who is that?

When your eyes finally adjust, you curse under your breath.

Personally, you would rather it be a murderer on the other side of the shelf. 

Because Huang Renjun of all people? Here? With you? Did the universe hate you or something?

You let out a faint groan, squeezing your eyes before you go to turn back to your table. 

Of course, Huang Renjun would be here and studying late. There’s a small tiny part of you that wasn’t even surprised that Renjun was the only other person at school at this hour. There was a reason why you felt like he was seriously going to do better than you on this physics final. He worked for it despite being naturally intelligent. 

“Fucking Huang Renjun,” you gently let your forehead fall forward, making a gentle thud against the table. Fucking Huang Renjun because, suddenly, you no longer feel hungry and you now desperately wanted to finish a week’s worth of content before leaving. Sure the idea was immature—doing all this for some guy who thought he was smarter than everyone else—but you couldn’t help it. This was how it’s been since junior high. 

And old habits die hard, right?

For the next 2 hours, you push yourself to study for the stupid final, eyes straining as you continuously shift them between your laptop screen and your papers. And you say push yourself because now that you had the knowledge that Renjun was sitting metres away from you, you somehow could not focus for the life of you. It was like he had cast some spell on you to do anything but focus on physics. 

You groan. You have been reading the same paragraph on boundary layers for the past ten minutes, hyper-aware of Renjun. The words blur together, and you become hyper-aware of Renjun's presence nearby. Despite your efforts, your mind wanders, and occasional stolen glances in his direction betray your attempts at concentration.

With an irritated sigh, you shake your head, attempting to bring yourself back to the task at hand. Why the fuck is Renjun occupying so much of your headspace?

Feeling defeated, you reach forward, roughly shutting your laptop closed before you begin bunching your papers up together. Not a single fibre in your body even cared if it was organized or not—that was for you to worry about later—because you just wanted out of here and away from Renjun before he completely plagues your mind. 

Finally, you throw your bag over your shoulder and begin making your way out of the library. 

Meanwhile, Renjun, who was managing well with his work catches sight of your figure leaving, winter coat zipped up to your nose. 

“Wait, Y/N!” 

You turn back to find Renjun pushing his seat back, getting up to make his way towards you. 

“Ugh,” you roll your eyes. You continue making your way out of the room, ignoring Renjun’s calls for you to stop. 

The mature response would be to, well, stop and listen, but after Renjun just indirectly wasted 2 hours of your life trying to absorb some information on physics, you didn’t want anything to do with him. You just wanted to go home and eat, before you pull another all-nighter to make up for the lost time. 

“Y/N!” 

You were jogging now, treating the situation like Renjun was some kind of monster coming after you. It was odd that Renjun was keeping up with you, tailing you like he was one of those salesmen trying to get you to try a sample of their product. 

You’re relieved when you see the front doors of the school ahead of you, streetlights illuminating through the small half-windows. You feel your feet pick up its pace, eager to finally get out of the building and get fresh air. 

“Y/N!” Renjun’s out of breath, “You can’t leave!” He reaches out and quickly grabs your wrist. The contact causes shivers to run up your arm and you’re quick to pull your limb back. 

Brows furrowed, you sent him daggers through your glare, “And why not?” 

Renjun fishes his phone out from his hoodie pocket and he holds it up despite you not being close enough to see anything on it, “The news. All the roads are closed. No cars on the roads. We’re stuck in here until they say everything’s clear.” 

“You’re lying.” Your stubborn ass refuses to believe Renjun. 

Renjun huffs, “Just check it for your fucking self if you don’t want to believe me.” His arms crossed and he pushes all his weight onto one leg. 

Reluctant to look stupid, you slowly pull your own phone out. You realize that you actually haven’t looked at any notifications lately, all your focus directed toward studying. When you finally look at your phone, you’re met with tens of notifications, both from the news app and a handful from your family members and friends, mainly Karina, who are asking if you’re going home soon or if you’ve gone home because of the news the city sent out about the roads. 

“And why didn’t you leave?” you say awkwardly, “When they sent the warnings out?” 

Renjun swallows his spit, “I didn’t see any of them either. I was too caught up with studying.” 

“Are you fucking kidding me?” you mutter. The realization of the situation starts to sink in—you're trapped at school, possibly overnight, and your only company is Huang Renjun, the boy who’s decided to make himself the bane of your existence. Then, you find yourself teetering between relief that you're not alone and frustration that you're stuck with Huang Renjun of all people.

Your eyes flicker at Renjun, who’s waiting for you to say something to him. And you do, “This is all your fault!”

Renjun’s mouth falls open slightly, the space in between his eyebrows wrinkling at your accusation, “How the hell is this my fault? I didn’t tell the damn city to close the roads!” Renjun holds himself back from raising his voice, but the emptiness of the halls causes it to bounce off the walls. 

“If I hadn’t seen you studying and being the overachiever you are, I would have gone home earlier,” you argue back. The second it slips from your lips, you realize how stupid you actually sound—but you don’t say anything. Without saying another word, you push past Renjun intending to return your spot in the library. 

Renjun, however, isn't one to let things slide. He follows you back into the library, his frustration evident in the tight set of his jaw. "So, it's my fault you chose to stay? That you didn’t see the notifications?” 

You shoot him a glare over your shoulder, not slowing your pace. "I chose to stay because of you! Trying too hard being a model student." 

Despite it being pretty clear that the argument was childish and that it was going nowhere, you and Renjun were far too stubborn to back down. 

Renjun scoffs, catching up to you. "Trying too hard!? I study because I take my education seriously. Maybe if you put in half the effort I do, you wouldn't be lagging behind."

"Oh, spare me, Renjun.” Your blood boils at his condescending tone, whirling around to face him and eyes ablaze with frustration. "You're insufferable, you know that?"

This is where you can see Renjun physically falter. The stress in his brows goes slack and there’s a shift in his expression, “Insufferable? Y/N I—”

"Whatever, Renjun. I really don’t want to speak to you right now.” You roll your eyes and turn your back on him, “Now, If you’ll excuse me, I have a fucking final to study for.”

Ignoring his attempts to keep the conversation alive, you make your way back to your table, your anger simmering in your chest. Renjun watches you go, a mixture of annoyance and something else in his eyes.

The library becomes a battleground of silent tension, each of you (mostly you) seething in your own space.

You set your table back up the way it previously was. Then, you quickly send your friends and family texts explaining what had happened and why you weren’t home by now. 

You attempt to start where you left off, the words Boundary Layers practically taunting you at this point. The phrase is pissing you off and you’ve read it enough times for you to be able to recite the sentence from the textbook perfectly. 

Wave interference, you read, eyes blinking at the screen—something about paths intersecting and creating new patterns of unity… discord… 

You let your eyes do the rest of the scanning, not exactly absorbing any of the material before you move on. At this point, you feel like not studying entirely. Besides, you weren’t exactly in the right state of mind to be absorbing material. 

The clock at the front of the library reads 8:28 and you feel like taking a nap is the best idea right now. It’ll help you cool off, pull you back in the right headspace and perhaps help you with the all-nighter you’ll probably pull tonight. 

Twisting your body, you pull your jacket off of your chair, folding it to create a makeshift pillow. Sliding your things aside, you place the pillow in front of you and shimmy your butt back against the chair before leaning forward to rest your head against it. In all honesty, it wasn’t the most comfortable place to rest your head, but it will have to do for now. 

⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆

The shuffling of feet and the clattering of objects woke you from your nap.

You don’t move, nor do you open your eyes, all you do is listen to try and figure out what the hell is going on. Through the fabric of your jacket, you can hear that Renjun is moving things around on your table and you can’t help but feel your anger shoot up. 

You keep your cool on the outside, pretending to stir in your sleep before you peek through half-opened eyelids. 

You’d honestly find this part funny if you were watching a drama. But the thing was, you weren’t watching a drama. And it was anything but funny. 

Slowly, you raise your head to get a better look at what Renjun was up to, fully expecting him to be messing with your belongings. You guess you were doing your job correctly because Renjun seems to not have noticed you looking at him. 

The scene (you embarrassingly admit) warms a piece of your heart just by a little bit—and you hate that it does.

Renjun’s trying to keep your papers organized, stacking them horizontally and then vertically to keep them grouped in the stacks you already had them in. He had even moved your laptop to a safer spot, off to the side. 

The reason why he was doing all this was sitting just across the table from you and to Renjun’s left. 

Two cups of instant ramen.

“What are you doing?'' Your voice comes out more hoarse than you’d like, but it was probably because you’ve been napping for what felt like an hour or two. 

Renjun freezes, lips parting slightly and eyes growing two times its size when he realizes that you’re awake. Sure, he would have had to wake you up sooner or later, but you waking up on your own wasn’t part of his plan. He should’ve done all this a bit quieter. 

“I…” He starts. Renjun gulps and pulls back, wringing his hands through sweater paws. 

You wait for him to give you a coherent reply, looking at him in hopes of forcing one out of him. 

Renjun’s at a loss for words, afraid that you wouldn’t quite get him if he explained his reasoning. He leans over and wraps his hand around one of the noodle cups, gently sliding it toward you. 

You blink at the steaming cup in front of you, caught between annoyance and a peculiar sense of gratitude. "Are you trying to make this situation bearable or something?" 

“Well it wouldn’t be fair competition if only I was able to eat, would it?” Renjun shrugs. From his hoodie pocket, Renjun pulls out a plastic fork wrapped in tissue, one he had probably taken from the cafeteria, and places it next to your cup of noodles, “Eat.” 

You blink at the noodles and eye the boy suspiciously, “You didn’t do anything to it, did you?” You mistrustfully pull the fork toward you, unwrapping it before you dip it into the soup. 

“Of course not… I’m not evil.” A scoff shoots out through Renjun’s nose. 

Renjun pulls out a chair from your table, taking a seat before pulling his own cup of noodles toward him. 

Your eyes linger on Renjun for a moment longer, contemplating whether or not you should believe him. Eventually, hunger wins over skepticism, and you take a cautious bite of the noodles. They taste surprisingly good, given the circumstances. 

For a while, there's a strange quiet as both of you focus on your meal. The only sounds are the occasional slurps and the storm outside rattling the windows. It's a bizarre scene, you and Renjun sharing instant ramen in the middle of the night, trapped at school. Who would have thought? 

As you dig into your food, you start feeling a shift in your mood. The annoyance from being woken up slowly turns into a grudging acknowledgement that Renjun tried to make things a bit less crappy. It's kind of funny when you think about it. You two had a small argument earlier, and now here you are, quietly sharing a meal. It's like an unspoken agreement, maybe a truce, even if neither of you is ready to admit it out loud.

Meanwhile, Renjun seems engrossed in his noodles, occasionally glancing in your direction as if gauging your reaction to the impromptu meal. He looks like he wants to say something, but he’s not choosing to do so despite the tension that is usually present in your interactions being strangely minimal. 

Finally, you break the silence. "Where did you get the noodles?"

He looks at you, brows raising at your willingness to start a conversation. "It’s not my first time staying past dinner. I have a stash in my locker."

“Not surprised,” you mumble. You pick the cup up and bring the rim up to your lips. Tipping your head back, you take sips of the soup, feeling the warmth of the fluids fall into your stomach like a hug. 

“Oh, shut up,” Renjun groans, “Or else I’ll take the noodles back.”

“Lucky for me,” you look at him and laugh, “I’m finished.” When you plop the fork back into the cup, it makes that noise you hear when you scratch the cardboard. 

Renjun hums. "Well then, I guess you owe me one. After all, you're enjoying the hospitality of my secret noodle stash." 

You roll your eyes, trying to maintain a facade of annoyance, but there's a glint of amusement in your eyes. Of course, Renjun would take this opportunity to gain something for himself. It was such a Renjun move. It’s always been like this. "I could've survived just fine without your instant noodles."

He chuckles, taking the last slurp of his own noodles before he deems himself finished, too. "And yet, you still ate it all up like a starved puppy.” 

There’s a beat of silence before you lean forward, resting your head on your propped arm, “I guess I should say thank you, huh?” 

Renjun grins and you only notice it because it’s more evident in his eyes than it was on his lips. He was seemingly pleased with your acknowledgment, but he quickly covered it up with a nonchalant shrug, "Don't mention it.” His voice comes out soft, mirroring the setting, “If you passed out from hunger under my watch, wouldn’t want that tainting my ‘model student’ image.”

You give him a side-eye, feeling the sudden need to tease him, “Don’t lie, Huang Renjun, you secretly care about me.” The statement was mostly a joke, so you think nothing of it. You stack your empty cup onto Renjun’s and stand up to throw it out. You don’t notice the way Renjun freezes in his seat for half a second.

“And what if I did?” Renjun shrugs. He gulps and feels the sudden need to flee the situation—Why did he say that? 

You turn to face him, surprised by his response. Renjun's casual demeanour, though slightly defensive, holds a hint of genuineness. It's a side of him you're not used to seeing, and it catches you off guard. 

"What if you did what?" you ask, feigning ignorance to see if Renjun would elaborate. A part of you is afraid of what he’s going to say. 

“What if I did care about you?” Renjun’s playing with the corner of one of your papers, creating a sound that fills the silence between the two of you, “I don’t hate you as a person, you know… I get that we always compete in grades and extracurriculars but… I don’t hate you as a person.” 

The confession makes your heart skip a beat and you catch yourself beginning to chew on your bottom lip, something you do when you’re nervous. The unexpected sincerity in his words causes you to halt your own, a momentary pause in your banter. You've grown used to the constant back-and-forth, the verbal sparring that characterizes your interactions with Renjun. This, however, feels different. 

"You're messing with me, right?" you reply, half expecting him to smirk and dismiss the entire conversation as a joke.

“What do you think?” Renjun retorts. 

You take a moment to think everything through. You have a good feeling Renjun’s not joking, that he really doesn’t hate you as a person, and you can’t help but think about the other possibilities of what this meant. Then you think about how you feel towards Renjun because you guess you at least owed him that. 

“You don’t need to say anything now,” Renjun assures, “It’s… confusing. Even I'm still figuring things out… I just know that I don’t hate you.” 

"You're not as insufferable as I claim you are,” you begin cautiously, “But it pisses me off that you both distract and motivate me when it comes to school.” And this was true. Today was a good example of that, though you weren’t entirely sure where these stem from. 

Renjun raises an eyebrow, his lips curling into a half-smile. "I'll take that as a compliment.” 

You roll your eyes. "Don't get too ahead of yourself, Renjun. I’m just saying—” “—Saying that you like me more than you think you do?” Renjun interrupts, “I know, I know.”

Your eyes narrow at Renjun, “You wish.” 

A moment of understanding passes between you, and for the first time, the competitiveness in your dynamic softens. It's not yet a friendship, but it's a recognition that there's more to each other than the constant rivalry. 

Renjun laughs, which transitions into a yawn. He acknowledges your comment with a hum, “I’m going to take a nap. Wake me up in a bit so I can study?”

You playfully roll your eyes, a small smile lingering on your lips. 

“Well it wouldn’t be fair competition if I didn’t, would it?”

tags: @tytrackfebreze @lovesuhng @hoonieji @niinjo @dinonuguaegi

an: the next few parts of the series might be posted a day late (until Felix,, but we'll see!). Next up is Jisung which I feel like will be ADORABLE. ty for taking the time to read! I would love to hear your thoughts even if its something short! hope you enjoyed it!

[ultraintrovertedgryffindor]

Tate Langdon - American Horror Story

Wrote this a long time ago. My original plan back then was so make this into a multiple chapter story, but then I ultimately lost interest like all my other failed projects. 🙃

I also didn’t know how to fucking end this story, sorryyy ughhhh

❗Trigger warning❗

~~~~~~~~~~

Welp, I am dead.

Like, super dead.

One minute I’m slitting my wrists wide open in my bathroom and now I’m standing over my body watching myself decay.

I never thought I’d become a ghost or whatever I am. I didn’t even believe in the afterlife. I thought I’d just die and that would be it. I wouldn’t feel anything, it’d be peaceful. I was definitely wrong.

I moved into this big mansion in California with my parents. I didn’t want to die, I just thought it was my only way out. Now, I’m stuck here. Great. I really screwed the pooch this time.

After my parents found me rotting away, they decided to move away to have a fresh new start. Not that I blame them. But I was kinda pissed they just left me here, unable to step one foot off this property except for Halloween.

If I’m being completely honest, it’s not that terrible. I’m not alone. Turns out, many people have died here. Violently, which is fun.

There’s a woman that lives here who is kinda crazy, but she’s nice. She treats me better than my own mother did. She wishes I was a baby though, cause her baby is all kinds of fucked up.

There’s an elderly woman here too, who I found out was actually dead and lived here. When I was alive, she was our maid and constantly tried to seduce my father, which I reluctantly forgave her for that.

That weird neighbour, Constance, always visits here, since she has multiple children who have died here as well. I’ve yet to meet her eldest, Tate. To be honest, I don’t think I want to meet him. I’ve seen him wander around the halls but I’ve never shown myself around him. Mrs. Montgomery says he’s just misunderstood, but shooting up a school is a little too much for me.

I hang out with his brother sometimes, and by hanging out I mean basically rolling a ball back and forth. It makes him somewhat happy though, I guess. I know one of these days I’m going to run into him, I just hope it’s later rather than sooner.

~~~

Today, that real estate agent bitch is trying to sell this house, yet again. Only for the owners to be killed and get stuck here for all eternity. Anyone in their right mind would not buy this house, especially knowing what took place here.

I watch the family interested in buying the house from my old bedroom. They look like a relatively normal family. A mom, dad, and their angsty teenage daughter and a cute pet dog.

Yeah, they definitely wouldn’t survive living here.

“Spying on the new folks, I see?”

“Jesus! You scared me!” I turn to see Tate. Oh boy, this should be fun.

“Y/N L/N. How lovely to finally meet you. I never got the chance to introduce myself when you first moved here cause you see, you killed yourself before I even got the chance. Which was kind of rude on your part.” He smirked. “Your death was very entertaining, I must say. All that blood gushing everywhere, man, it was quite the spectacle.”

“Glad you found my death so entertaining, Tate. I’m sure yours was too.” I smile sweetly, making his smug grin quickly turn into a glare.

“Anyway,” he coughed, “better introduce myself to the new folks soon.”

“But...you’re dead.”

“Well, they don’t need to know that.” He walked over to the window where I saw. “That girl’s kinda hot, wouldn’t you say?” He smirked. “Don’t worry though, I find you even prettier.”

I scoffed and kept looking out the window. The teenage girl looked over towards the window. I quickly hid myself from her sight but Tate didn’t until she did a double take.

I gave him confused look. “What? It’s fun to play with people’s minds from time to time. You should try it sometime. Stop being a stick in the mud.” He said and walked away.

I can already tell he’s going to be so annoying.

I decided to take a closer look at the new comers. Tate was right though, that girl is pretty. I listened in on their conversation and I learned their names. Ben, Vivian, and Violet. All nice names, nice innocent names. They seem like nice people, sucks that they’ll die when they move in.

A few hours, Adelaide sneaks into the house. She always finds a way in here. She waves and smiles at me when she walks past, I still don’t know how she’s able to see me when I’m not visible to anyone, not that I mind cause I love her like a sister. She walks up behind Vivian, “You’re going to die in here.”

She’s never been one to know how to start a conversation.

~~~

I learned that Ben was a psychiatrist and Tate had an appointment with him today. He seems to be really determined to get to know these people, especially Violet. I thought about listening in, but that seemed too much. I just wandered the halls until I reached the bathroom. Violet hurts herself?

I hear footsteps and quickly sped off down the hall and hid behind a corridor, it was Tate. “You’re doing it wrong. If you wanna kill yourself, you should cut vertically. The doctors can’t stitch that up.” I hear him say.

What the hell? Why would he say that?

He closed the door and walked off. I shook my head and went up to the attic, my usual hang out spot.

I sat in the corner, I looked up and saw that the creepy rubber costume wasn’t there anymore. Thank god, that thing creeped me out to no end.

A red ball rolls to me, and I sigh. “I’m not in the mood, Beau.” I roll it back and it stays.

The attic door opens and Tate pops his head in, he sees me and smiles. “So, this is where you hang out? Good to know.” He says.

“Why? So you can annoy me better?” I say.

“Aw, don’t be like that. We should be friends.”

I laugh. “Yeah, right.”

Tate simple smirked and sat down beside me. “Come on. We’d make awesome...friends.”

I quickly scowled at him. “Why would you say that to Violet by the way? She could actually be convinced to do that, you know.”

“Oh, I was just trying to get another girl so we could have an afterlife threesome. Doesn’t that sound great?”

“Get outta here.”

Tate rolled his eyes, blowing me a kiss as he opened up attic door and descended the ladder. 

I scoff. This kid really is crazy, maybe it’s a good thing that he’s seeing Dr. Harmon. Tate climbed down the ladder and the attic door closed with a loud slam.

The red ball rolls to me.

~~~

Tate is hanging out with Violet on her room. I’m not stalking him! I just wanna make sure he doesn’t kill her. “Tate. What are you doing here? You need to leave now.” Ben says. Violet tries to calm her dad, but he insisted on him leaving.

“Just trying to be friends with your friendless daughter, Ben” Tate says. I roll my eyes and leave the hallway, accidently bumping into the kid. “Woah there. Aw, is someone spying on me?” He smirked.

I scoff. “As if.” Tate had a playful twinkle in his eyes, making me feel more nervous in his presence. “Just making sure you don’t murder that girl.”

“Me? Murdering someone? Nah.” He joked, but when he saw that I wasn’t joking, he dropped his smile. “Look, my murdering days are behind me, okay? I don’t want to hurt anyone anymore. I promise.”

“I’ll make sure to hold you to that, pretty boy.”

“Aw, you think I’m pretty?”

“Don’t push me.” I scowled, Tate fake saluting me before I started to walk off. I gasped when I suddenly felt Tate turn me around so he could plant a kiss on my cheek. “What the hell?” I stuttered.

Tate simply shrugged and smiled. “You just look very kissable.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Ugh, this flopped but whatever

[deadspace-babe]

Day 1: Temperature

2k words

I know I’m a day late but I should have day 2 out by tonight so don’t worry.

This is my first kinktober writing so I hope you enjoy. Based off the paid option in the tower with Julian

     It’s late one night and the two of you are simply lounging around half naked in each other’s company enjoying the fall air. The weathers finally gotten cold enough to lay on each other comfortably through the night. The breeze drifting through all the windows and through your hair as you read. You’re laid out on your back with Julian on top of you on his stomach, head on your chest. Next to you is a soft glowing orb radiating warmth to help you read. 

You notice he’s been staring at it for a while. “Do you like it? You’ve seen it before.”

He sighs, “I was just thinking about the heat coming from it.”

“What about it?” You ask, “is it too hot?”

He breathes out a small laugh at you, “no, nothing like that dear I’m simply thinking of all the ways you can use your magic.” He turns his head to look up at you. “You know, like in the tower” he wiggles his eyebrows at you. 

“Good gods Julian are you ever not horny”, you laugh ruffling his hair. 

“Ughhhh but how can I stay still with such a vision around all the time?!?” He says while rolling about like a child throwing a tantrum. You laugh at him and act like you’re ignoring him so he simply lays his head back down on your chest and pouts. You let your hand stoke up and down his shoulders for a few minutes to distract him then turn them ice cold which makes him jump about a foot in the air. 

“Ah you sly dog” he whispers, wiggling his eyebrows at you yet again. You roll yours eyes at him,

“Since you asked how about you lay back and enjoy yourself” you say running scalding fingers down the side of his cheek which makes him wince and squirm. You toss your books to the side and push at his shoulder lightly, gesturing for him to roll over, which he does, squirming desperately already. You giggle at him a little before climbing on top and straddling his waist. He’s turned such a bright red you wonder if it’s from the burn on his cheek or if he’s just this worked up already. 

“Which would you like first?” You ask looking deep into his grey eyes. He’s struggling to keep eye contact, looking quite embarrassed. 

“Surprise me love. I’m sure whatever you choose will be absolutely delicious” he says, feigning confidence. You take the cue getting a bit excited yourself running two very hot hands down his chest. He pushes upwards a bit like he’s trying to get away from it but also trying to push it down his body faster which makes you slow even more. He’s panting already. You watch the red marks on his chest fade and the mark on his throat glow. You reach up to kiss it with ice cold lips. He sucks air in hard through his teeth “damn”, you feel his excitement between your legs. 

“Hmh well that was fast wasn’t it?” You giggle at him and he can barely manage out a whine already. In response you send heat to your thighs. He bucks up hard. 

“Sorry love” he whispers between pants, his pupils already blown wide. You shush him rubbing circles at his ribs with ice cold fingers not letting up on the heat in your thighs. 

“Talk to me Jules. Do you like it or do you want something different”

“Ah! Ugh no it’s” he pant he can’t seem to finish his sentence well, “it’s perfect” he grinds up into you desperate whines getting louder. “The heat is making me feel like, like I’m going to cum. It’s so hot it’s-“ before he can finish your switch the temperature of your thighs to ice in a second causing him to gasp and shoot up. It honestly is making you a bit nervous at how intense his reactions are. 

“Was that too much you have to tell me I’ll stop if you need me too” you say concern clearly coating your voice. 

He grabs your face trying so hard to look at you while wincing. “Do it again” he pants. The arousal in his voice lights you on fire. You dive at his mouth, raising the heat in your thighs and grinding down. He hisses into your mouth. You pull at his hair guiding his head back and his mouth open plunging your tongue in making it cold. He moans as he kisses you deeper, seeming to like the chill of your mouth on his. You make your thighs switch to cold again abruptly releasing his mouth as he arches up gaping and moaning. You can feel his dick twitching beneath you. 

“Are you ready for a little more?” You ask softly running warm hands up and down his sides as you watch him desperately try to suck in air. 

“Yes please” he pants shakily, looking wrecked already. 

“As you wish” you say whispering into the skin at his neck. You trail cold kisses and licks down his body as you move your way down between his legs only to be met with a rather large wet spot on the top of his underwear. You look up at him but he seems to be too busying trying to breathe properly to notice you staring. “Cute” you whisper to yourself as you pull down his underwear. 

“Ah!” He shouts loud enough to startle you as his dick hit the air, the breeze causing it to jump and twitch. 

You snicker at him, “you’re really enjoying this aren't you love? Maybe we should have been doing this from the start?” All he can manage is some very aggressive nodding as he squirms and fists the sheets trying desperately to grab onto something. 

You start again, rubbing cold circles into the dip of his hip bones. You blow cold air softly watching his dick bounce and twitch dripping and swollen. You giggle then move forwards pressing your tongue to the base and dragging it up making it hotter and hotter as you reach the top only to flick his swollen head with the tip of an ice cold tongue. 

“Fuck (y/n)!!!” He yells thrusting upwards shooting cum up and across his chest. You grab his cock with hot hands rubbing him as he rides the orgasm through looking absolutely distressed. He’s still bucking upwards while shoving his hands repeatedly through his hair as if it could help him steady himself. You let go laying your head on his hip watching him struggle to breath gently tracing invisible patterns on his coated stomach. 

“How do you feel?” You ask after a minute of just breathing. 

“Euphoric” he says through breaths. “Where did you learn that anyways?” 

You laugh at him, “really I just use it to keep my tea warm but I think I like this use much more” 

“Ya” he sighs out shakily

“Do you want to keep going?” You ask bringing your head up to kiss his still hard dick with ice cold lips knowing he’s going to say yes. 

“Of course” he says smiling, his breath picking up again as he tries to prop himself up on his elbows to watch you tease him. 

“Ok but not I’m going easy on you” you tease crawling up his body to give him a lazy kiss. 

“Do your worse” he whispers into your mouth sitting up all the way to grab onto your lip with his teeth. You smile at him diving in and deepening the kiss, one hand in his hair and one hand moving your underwear out of the way then to guide him to you. You’re absolutely drenched just from listening to him fall apart. He’s just so intoxicating. He lights you on fire and you can’t get enough. Even though you feel as desperate as he looks all you can think about as you sink down on him is how much you love him unconditionally. You gasp into his mouth and tell him just that. 

“I love you I love you I love you I love you” its all you can think to say as you bounce on top of him your lips still so close you can feel his breath grazing them. 

“I love you more than life itself”, he says breathlessly kissing you deep and desperate. You moan into his mouth shoving cold hands up his scalp pulling at his hair and quickly raising the heat in your pussy. He grips your hips hard and tries to thrust in time with you. The heat is obviously getting to him. He can’t keep the kiss anymore instead focusing on trying to breathe. He throws his head back and lets out a raspy groan. “So hot. Too hot. I can’t-I cant” 

“You can” you get cold slamming your pelvis harder into his sending shock waves up your body the air vibrating with magic. He falls forward, head on your shoulder, hands on your hips. You stop bouncing for a second and let the cold drop even further feeling him twitch inside of you and the grip on your waist grow tighter. You hear and pop and both of your heads snap up and you jump a little. You look down to realize with the energy in the room Julian has managed to summon his own magic leaving large puffy red hand prints on both of your sides. 

“Did- did I???? Did I burn you?” He tried to separate himself from you panicking but you pull him in to hug him. 

“Do it again.” You say into his shoulder. 

“But but I hurt you, you can’t heal like me. I don’t want to hurt you” he’s freaking out now 

You grab the sides of his face hard and force him to look at you, “Ilya, I like it. You know you can take the marks away later and even if you couldn’t I’m a magician. I have healing spells. But I like it. So for me, focus on it and do it again” 

“Are you positive? I don’t know if I can do it again” he says, still seeming a bit nervous. 

“I am and even if you can’t do it again on purpose I’ll just have to get you wound up again, that’s all” you say winking at him as you start to move again. He hisses at you, still sensitive. The heat starts to rise again. He looks you in the eyes determined. This time he leans his chest against you grabbing you by the ass spreading you as you still bounce on top of him. He can feel the heat radiating into his palms and he focuses on it while trying to breathe properly at the same time. You start to feel the heat from his palms squeezing your ass and it’s getting hotter and hotter. “Yes!” You yell bouncing harder

“I can’t do cold yet but I hope this is good enough” he says hopefully

“It’s amazing!” You pant. You’re starting to lose your composure, the heat in his large hands, how he’s trying so hard for you, how he feels inside of you as the heat is still rising. It’s all lighting you on fire. Your ears are starting to ring and your hips start stuttering. He’s trying to help you keep the rhythm. His hands spark and pop. He runs them up and down your sides. Your cold hands doing the same to his back. The heat is becoming overwhelming, you don’t know what to do with yourself. You feel like all you can do is shake and rithe. Even though most of it is heat you’re creating you're no longer able to move your hips properly being so close to the edge and so so hot it feels like it’s eating you alive. 

“Lean back” is all he says as you feel your body hitting the sheets. He starts pounding into you. You’re not sure how he has so much stamina but you’re thankful. You use all the energy you can to drop the temp once more causing him to push so hard you fly up a few inches and he has to clench his teeth hard just to not cum on the spot. “Damn!” 

“Kiss me now” you say and he complies eagerly. His mouth is on fire this time. He’s getting used to it. He starts to move again. You both raise the heat between your hips so high you’re pretty sure your bodies are producing steam. He puts a hot hand on your breast, you arch hard into the air. Both of you move faster. It’s so overwhelming you can’t think. You drag your nails down his back just needing something to grip and he thrusts hard, cumming loudly. The heat in his hands quite literally burn marks in your skin causing you to scream and raise the heat in your core higher than you thought you could making him jerk into you once again sending you over the edge pulling desperately at his hair as if he were going to disappear. 

You sit there for a long while steaming and panting and shaking not sure if you could even hear anymore. A cool night turned hot and sticky handprints all over each other, sheets soaked. It took a long while for either of you to move as the magic drained all the energy you might have had left. 

When you finally got up you immediately collapsed to the floor leaning up against the bed, your limbs absolutely shaking. Julian rolled,  hanging his head over the side of the bed just to laugh at you. “Oh shut up, are you going to help me or just laugh?”

“Trust me dear I would but I’m positive I can’t even sit up” he says barely able to lift his arms to stroke your hair as you sit on the cool floor trying to work up the energy just to get up again. 

“God’s we’re going to be sore for weeks” you sigh.

[elisaphoenix13]

Beating The Heat Again

Scott groans when he's nudged and he reaches up to pat Emir's head. The tiger rumbles softly and nudges the man some more and Scott pushes him away just enough to sit up and rub his eyes. Emir took up quite a bit of the bed, much like Quill, and Scott was very glad for the king sized bed. Now that they had Emir, there was absolutely no space for anyone else. It was plenty full with two grown men and a tiger, and it was really a good thing that Flynn was small enough to curl up by Quill's neck. At the tower, they had lots of space in their room to kick Emir off the bed if they needed or wanted to, but here at the lake house, Emir didn't have the floor space he needed so was always on the bed.

"Alright, come on." Scott yawns and gets up.

Emir steps off the bed after scruffing Flynn to follow Scott out of the bedroom, and the man quietly makes his way over to the master bedroom and cracks the door open. Inside, both Tony and Stephen were still comfortably asleep and baby Lucy was asleep in her crib. Valerie had recently been moved to her own room but from the looks of it, she had come in earlier in the morning since Scott could see her tucked under one of Stephen's arms between the sorcerer and Tony. It was slow progress keeping her in her room at her age but it was normal.

"Athena." Scott whispers and the wolf raises her head to look at him. "Come on, outside."

Athena yawns with a small whine at the end and carefully hops down from the bed to join Scott and the other two animals in the hallway. Once Scott silently shuts the bedroom door again, he walks downstairs to the back door and opens it for Emir who was much too big for the pet door Tony had installed for Athena. As soon as the animals are outside, he shuts the door and checks the time, deciding it was late enough to start the day by brewing some coffee. Seven was much more bearable than five, but Scott still wasn't much of a morning person. He'd probably doze on the couch until more people woke up.

"Get pushed out of bed by the beast again?" Bucky asks from the couch and Scott jumps.

"Geez, I didn't even see you there." Scott wills his thumping heart to calm. "It depends on which beast you're referring to." He adds.

"The one you just let out." The other man laughs.

Scott snorts. "Almost. He probably would have if I didn't wake up right away. What are you doing up? Nightmare?"

"No, actually. Just...woke up feeling well rested."

"Ugh. I wish. I still need at least another two hours of sleep."

Bucky laughs and Scott sits on the couch next to him and lays his head back. The soldier turned on the tv to play quietly in the background and Scott dozed lightly as the house slowly began to wake up. Of course, Tony was one of the first ones awake since he probably smelt the coffee brewing, and Sam was close behind. As they got their coffee, the animals came back inside and Scott looked up with an arched eyebrow when they all sprawled out on the floor panting.

"You guys play too hard or something?" Scott asks.

"It's supposed to be pretty warm today," Sam mentions. "There's probably going to be a lot of swimming."

"It's already hot enough that I want to do this," Tony grabs some ice from the freezer and dumps a few cubes into his coffee.

"Yeah, give me some of those too." Sam holds his mug out and the engineer drops a few cubes into his. "We shouldn't want to do that inside."

Tony looks up from his coffee and at the men in the living room and kitchen before it dawns on him. "It does feel a little warm in here…"

Scott watches him walk away to check the thermostat and hears him swear quietly to himself. Stephen came down next and he was carrying Lucy in just a diaper and Valerie was in a t-shirt and a pull up. Stephen...he already looked miserable. He was in a loose t-shirt and shorts and looked like he had woken up drenched in sweat. Scott was already using his shirt to try and cool off.

"Tony, it's way too hot in the house." Stephen says.

"I know honey. I think the AC is out. I'll go see if I can fix it." Tony responds as he sets his mug on the counter as he heads out the backdoor and Stephen gently shushes the girls when they whine.

"I know it's hot. Let's get you something cold." He says softly.

Scott and Bucky get up to help Stephen with the girls, and Scott pulls out the popsicles.

"Not ideal for breakfast, but considering the circumstances-" he stops when Stephen takes one and opens it.

"If it's this hot this early, it's only going to get worse." Stephen says as he hands one half to Valerie and puts Lucy in the highchair to help her suck on the other half. "Whatever helps them stay cool."

The teenagers are the next to come down and they all looked disheveled and sweaty. The boys were already wearing the least amount of clothes as possible, which meant their swim trunks, and Cassie had the same idea. She changed into her bikini with a thin bikini cover for some semblance of consideration for others, and even had Diana do the same. When they saw Scott holding popsicles, they all mumbled miserably and took one for themselves and spread out around the house to slowly eat their breakfast.

"What...the...hell?" Quill comes stumbling down last after the rest of the Avengers wake up and Scott sighs when he finds his husband in nothing but his boxers.

"I can't even get excited. It's too hot for that." Scott mumbles.

"We have to burn our mattress." Quill says. "It's soaked with sweat."

"Gross." Scott and Stephen say in unison.

The god mumbled something about cooling towels before he disappeared back upstairs, and everyone followed the kids lead by sprawling out wherever they could find space. No one went upstairs since heat rises, and they turned on the tv in an attempt to distract them all from the sweltering temperature. Even Bucky had the consideration to put ice in the pets' water bowls and they moved just enough to lay by the bowl and lazily lap at the water. No one had the energy to go outside and try to cool down in the lake.

"Ughhhh." Peter groans. "Mom, can't you open a portal to Mount Everest like you did before?"

"Someone get me my sling ring." Stephen leans back in his chair and tries to use his shirt to cool himself off.

Nobody got up straight away but eventually Natasha slowly rolled to her feet and braved the upstairs to get the sling ring. Someone had fans going full blast and nobody even knew where they came from but they were a small blessing until Peter came up with the Everest idea. Those and the cooling towels. Quill only had so many and they were soaked in ice water and given to the kids, and then he found a spot as far away from everybody as he could get.

"It's hell upstairs." Natasha mumbles as she walks down and hands the sling ring over to Stephen.

He thanks her as he slips it on and just a few hand movements later, tiny gateways to Mount Everest were opened all over the house. There was a collective sigh of relief and soon enough, everyone had garnered enough energy to sit up. Stephen even managed to bring himself to clean the girls up and help Valerie down from her chair so she can go sit with William and watch tv. He let Steve take Lucy while he and Scott made some ice cold lemonade, and Scott handed the glasses out to everyone inside while Stephen braved the outside to take a glass out to Tony.

"Man, the A/C picked the worst time to break down." Pietro says. "Think Stark is crispy already?"

"Maybe." Sam gulps down his lemonade. "I don't think I've ever been so glad to have Stephen and his sling ring.

"Just don't stick any body parts in the portals." Bruce warns. "If Stephen decides to close them, you'll lose that body part."

"Don't even think about it Quill." Scott says immediately before even looking at his husband.

When he did, the celestial was pulling his hand away from the nearest portal.

"What? I can regenerate them!" Quill says.

"It'll still hurt you moron." Sam rolls his eyes.

"That's true."

"You guys want to go swimming?" Cassie asks.

"Might as well give it a shot." Thomas shrugs and the teens get up and head outside.

They even took Diana and Valerie but the adults weren't worried. Cassie and William would keep a close eye on them. Everyone else continued to watch tv, make more drinks, and some even pulled out the board games. Monopoly was the chosen game played by Scott, Sam, Wanda, Steve, and Bucky. And then there was a dirtier card game which was played by everyone else not watching tv. When Lucy took an interest in the small pieces on the monopoly board, Steve handed her to Natasha since she was playing the card game and it was much safer for her to chew on. The baby had no interest in the cards though and was content to chew on the teething ring someone dug out of the freezer for her.

After another hour, both Tony and Stephen finally came back inside and the engineer went straight upstairs for a cold shower and the sorcerer closed the portals as the air conditioning kicked on. Fortunately the house didn't warm back up before it could start cooling down and everyone remained comfortable. Even the pets.

"So is the lake enough to keep the kids cool?" Bruce asks.

"They say it is, but I'm sure they'll be in soon anyway. It's boiling out there." Stephen wipes his face. "I think I'll go join Tony. A cold shower sounds nice."

"Take your time making another baby. I'm sure even Tony can still get it up in a cold shower." Natasha laughs and Stephen rolls his eyes as his climbs the stairs.

"I hate you all."

"Love you too Mom!" Everyone calls out in unison.

"Quill, would you please go put some pants on now?" Sam complains.

"I dunno. I'm pretty comfy like this."

"Quill, go put some pants on." Scott says and the god huffs and gets up to go upstairs.

Pietro throws his wrist out and makes a whipping noise and a few people cackle. Quill returned with shorts on, but nobody complained since it was still a step up from just his boxers, and they kind of pitied him too. He ran warmer than the rest of them so he was probably still a little bit uncomfortable and would be until the house was completely cooled down. Stephen and Tony returned looking refreshed and dressed in light clothing and Tony sat on the couch after taking Lucy from Natasha. Stephen went back over to the kitchen to make a proper meal, which Bucky got up to help with.

"I've got it. You play your game." The sorcerer waves the soldier away.

"Oh, I'm out. Scott took every penny I had and I've been sitting and watching for the past half hour." Bucky says.

"Did he get Boardwalk and Park Place?"

"In two trips around the board. Lucky bastard." Bucky snorts. "Wanda might be next."

"Not might." Scott snickers when the woman pushes all of her money over to him and gets up.

Wanda looks at Emir and points at Scott. "Go get your daddy. He's lonely."

The tiger got up and lumbered over to Scott and the man protested loudly as Emir made himself comfortable by laying half of his body on Scott's lap. It took some readjusting, but the tiger was able to stay and Scott was able to keep playing the game, especially since Emir somehow managed not to bump the board.

"Not a house cat." Scott wheezed out in the middle of it all, making everyone laugh.

"I'll cut up the watermelon." Bucky offers as he takes it out of the fridge. "Pretty sure the kids will enjoy it when they come back inside."

"Watermelon slices on a hot summer day is a staple." Steve agrees and pushes his money toward Scott as well. "Sam, I wouldn't even bother drawing this out."

"Don't tell me what to do. I can still win." Sam grunts.

"You literally have fifty-three dollars to speak of."

"It can still happen!"

"It's true." Tony says. "I was in a similar situation but I only had six dollars and a get out of jail free card."

"That sound like something that could have happened during your bachelor days." Natasha snorts.

Tony looks at her, thinks about it, then shrugs.

"Probably happened then too."

[mypersonalrambling]

Feelings Shouldn’t Remain Hidden

Warnings: Language, Smut/Sexual themes, Insecurities

Pairings: Alex x Reader

Requested: By no one

Author’s note: I have been working on this for months. I hope it’s up to par :)

Plopping down on the couch, you let out an exasperated sigh. Finally, you were done cleaning the apartment from top to bottom. It was hard keeping everything straightened with you working full time and Alex always off filming or doing some sort of press. He helped as much as he could, however, it was easier for him to trash the place rather than clean it. Not more than an hour later Alex came stumbling through the door covered in sweat, looking ragged. 

“God, my back is killing me,” Alex groans as soon as the door shuts behind him. He’s been working out extra lately to keep up his shape. He loves the way his trainer pushed him when he was working out to be Ivar. Flopping down on the couch, he throws his gym bag just far enough to be out of the way. “I don’t know if I want to keep this regime up.”

“Yes you do, now stop complaining.” You can’t help but roll your eyes. Alex loves working out yet complains every time he does. You look over to see his face pressed into the couch, an arm and a leg hanging off the side, and was pretty sure there was a 95 percent chance he was asleep.

“Don’t roll your eyes at me,” he grumbles, his face never leaving the couch.

“I didn’t,” you reply wondering how in the hell he could tell when his face was surely imprinted into the cushion by now.

For the first time since he got home, he lifts his face from the couch, “Yeah and I’m not sore from this damn workout,” the statement laced with sarcasm.

“I don’t know whatever you could mean,” you claim, taking a huge gasp for emphasis, “I’ll give you a back massage if you’d like.” It wasn’t that you minded listening to him complain, it was more if Alex had wanted to quit he would have already. He let out a groan while standing up, the thought of a massage sounding heavenly. While Alex settles in,  you grab some oil wanting to relax him as much possible. When you walk out of the bathroom, he was lying on your bed in just his grey sweatpants.

Fuck, could he look any better? The muscles of his back are defined, but not so much so to seem too overdone. Alex had the perfect body, at least to you anyway. Although you knew most of your attraction came from his personality. He was warm, fuzzy yet rough around the edges. He could make you laugh until tears were pouring down your face but also able to protect you given the circumstances called for it.

You climb up to rest on the left side of him, dropping a little oil onto his back. Even though you’d been friends with Alex for a while, you didn’t want to cross any boundaries he may have, so instead of straddling him, you decide to stay to his side. You were able to tell his lower back was the tensest, thus starting there. “Doll, why are you sitting like that?”

“Uh, I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable or hurt you...” you trail off. He rolls to one side raising an eyebrow at you, clearly wondering what was going on in your head.

“One you’d never hurt me and two why would it be uncomfortable? Would it make you uncomfortable?” No, it would be more like a dream come true. Alex is smart, talented and attractive of course you’d pictured yourself doing many activities like this...well maybe with a little less clothing. “Y/N?”

“Uh, no it doesn’t make me uncomfortable,” you were able to stutter. Throwing a leg over him so now you were straddling his ass. You work your fingers into his back, paying special attention to the spots that had the tightest knots. Kneading a particularly sore spot, Alex let out a grunt, “Sorry, too hard?”

“No, no keep going.” You took his word and dug a little harder, knowing it was going to take a little work for it to release. After his muscle relaxes a bit, you began working on the rest of his back. His muscles, tensing then relaxing, “Ughhhh your fingers are magic,” he moans. That's not the only thing that’s magic, you thought. His moans become harder and harder to ignore. You knew he wasn’t doing them intentionally, but you couldn’t help basking in the fact you were the cause of them. You didn’t realize how much the moans were affecting you until Alex mentioned, “If you’re gonna do that, let me turn over.”

“Huh?” You question his statement bringing you out of your trance.

“If you’re gonna grind down on me like that, I’ll turn over.” You could tell he was smirking even without seeing his face. Alex has always been a cheeky shit, but usually, it was playful and meaningless or so you’d thought. Little did you know Alex had been trying to feel you out for months, trying to see if he could tell how you felt about him. He’d mention wanting to go to a fancy restaurant or bringing you gifts for no reason. When you didn’t catch on he’d assumed it was because you didn’t want to hurt his feelings. After a few months, he’d given up and accepting the two of you as friends.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry,” you claim, rushing to maneuver yourself off his back. 

“I...uhhh...I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.” Subconsciously your hands move to cover your face, hoping to hide as much embarrassment as possible. You couldn’t help shifting your weight from side to side. This had to be in the top two embarrassing moments of your life, the only thing worse was when you had managed to trip, fall, and knock over a waitress holding drinks the first time you met The Vikings cast.

It was almost infuriating how flustered Alex was making you feel. You weren’t shy about sex, actually, you were frequently assertive. Sex was always a pleasant, exciting activity, the only other time you can ever remember being this apprehensive was when you lost your virginity and that was only due to being afraid they would see you as incompetent.

The bed shifted slightly Alex moving into a different position. Taking a deep breath you move your hands knowing eventually you would have to face him. Alex was again on his side, your eyes quickly training on the bulge in his pants. Try as you might you couldn’t get your eyes to stray from it. “Touch it, I know you want to.” Without a second thought, you reach a hand out to stroke him over his sweatpants. “Fuck,” he moans, grinding into your hand. You situate your body so you were lying next to him, your feet at his head. Reaching for the waistband you quickly find out he wasn’t wearing anything underneath. His cock sprung out bouncing towards his stomach. It was beautiful, long, veiny, with plenty of girth. The head was pink and leaking precum.

You couldn’t help but stare, wondering what to do now. There wasn’t a fiber of your being that didn’t want to wrap your lips around him until his come was running down your throat. Now that there was nothing between him and you, you couldn’t help but become hesitant. What if he thought you were terrible or didn’t like what you did? Alex made you feel as if you’d never even seen a penis and it was frankly annoying that he was able to have this power over you. 

Your hips buck forward when Alex’s fingers ghost over your clothed core, your thin shorts not providing much protection. “You’re loving this Prinsesse, I can smell you from here.” His face mere inches from you, the pet name causing a flutter in your stomach. He was always affectionate, giving you little nicknames, but this was different. His tone was deep, sultry, goosebumps spreading across your body. “Prinsesse?” This time he was more hesitant, unsure of himself. 

The air was thick with sexual tension, his fingers resting on your upper thigh only slightly moved from their previous position. His cock was inches from your face and was angry, red, begging to be touched. Mustering every ounce of confidence, you wrap your lips around his tip. The sounds escaping his lips encouraged you even more. You took as much of him into your mouth as physically possible. At first, your pace was quick, wanting Alex to reach his high, you wanted nothing more than have him fill your throat with come. “Slow down,” his voice was soft, barely above a whisper. Taking heed you slow down, almost letting him slip completely out of your mouth.

During this time you were swirling your tongue around his tip, but only for a second before completely taking him out to lick a long stripe down his length. A split-second decision later, you had one of his balls in your mouth and hand wrapped around his cock. Moments later a hand landed on the back your head, gripping a fist full of your hair. “Ah, so...good,” his words barely audible. You couldn’t help but make a show of popping one ball out of your mouth to suck on the other. This was the part you loved, hearing the moans, watching them come undone beneath you. His moans were gravelly, breathless causing you to clench your legs tight, trying to relieve the pressure.

The second time Alex touched you, he was more aggressive. Instead of merely grazing his fingers over you, he moved his hand in a leg of your shorts until his hand was resting over your panties. Although it wasn’t long before his hands were underneath touching your bare skin. His fingers ghosting over your entrance, using his middle and index fingers gathering your wetness. Much to your displeasure, Alex slipped his hand out bringing his fingers to his lips causing him to emit a growl. Before you had a moment to gather what was going on, Alex moved from your grasp, his sweatpants sliding down his calves, pooling at his feet. He kicked them off quickly, taking the next few moments to tug at your clothes.

Alex has you bare in no time, legs spread allowing him to gaze at everything. You felt as if you were on display with him inspecting every inch of you. His eyes were looking at you in your entirety, his bottom lip between his teeth, his pupils dilated making his eyes appear almost black. Subconsciously your arms fold themselves over your stomach, it didn’t last long Alex immediately moving them, “Stop, I want to see every part of you.” Something in his tone brought almost all of your confidence back to your body. A warm, comfortable feeling washing over you. All of your muscles that had been previously tense, relaxed. He took notice of this, more in tune with you and your body than usual, “There’s my girl, I knew you were there under that nervousness.”

You try to take some control, but he wasn’t having any of it. His dominance radiating throughout the room, making a warmth spread within you. He was still kneeling near your feet, making no movements. When you didn’t think you could take it any longer, he began placing kisses on your right ankle working his way up until he was centimeters from your core. Thinking he was going to pay attention to where you want him most, he, however, had different plans. He continued by placing kisses down your left leg. Just after he had finished his trail of your lower body, he made a move as to now hover above you.

He continued his onslaught of kisses, now at your neck, taking extra time to leave a mark on your collarbone. Time was seemingly in slow motion, every time Alex touched your skin, you felt a fire. His lips seem to be everywhere at once, your breasts, your stomach, no place left untouched. There was a time when you thought Alex’s onslaught would never end. You were unsure if he loved to see squirm or if he simply couldn’t get enough of your body. After every mark, Alex would lightly kiss the mark. “Alex, please…I need you…” your voice trails off, instead you grab a handful of his hair pushing him to your aching center.

His lips curl into a smirk, “Min pige knows what she wants. Who am I to deny her?” Alex slid his tongue along your folds, whimpering at the taste. “Mmmm I knew you would be sweet.” Your eyes closed when he brushes his tongue over your clit. His licks are playful, almost kitten-like. Alex seems to never get enough of teasing you, taking enjoyment in watching you squirm. Finally, he took the opportunity to wrap his lips around your clit sucking as if his life depended on it.

Not long after he thrust two fingers, curling them almost instantly, seeming to take no time in finding your g-spot. Once he did there was no letting up. He barely came up for air, determined to make you come, the only thing on his mind. Alex alternates between wrapping his lips around your clit and licking between your folds. His assault was quick paced, having the same amount of urgency as you did moments ago. Beads of sweat roll down your face, your hands clenching the once-crisp sheets, the tightening in your stomach becoming too prominent to ignore. Your orgasm crashes over you, overwhelming your entire body, whimpering a soft fuck as you come down.

Alex never stops his movements, riding out your orgasm. He licks every last drop of your juices, being cautious of your sensitivity. All the while you can only lie there, trying not to yelp at every touch. When he was satisfied he pushes himself to hover above you, face wet with your juices, however, this makes him more irresistible. You pull him into a heated kiss, grabbing a handful of his hair, able to feel his cock pressing against your thigh. Instinctively you begin grinding, trying anything to gain more friction.

Both of you pull away breathless, Alex leans over to open one of the draws on the nightstand searching for a condom.  The usual confident Alex is mixed with a man with nerves. He fumbles with packaging, finally using his teeth to open it. It took him several tries to correctly put the condom on. Usually, you’d be ecstatic that a partner chose to wear a condom without being asked, however, you couldn’t help but feel a little disappointment, wishing to be as close to Alex as possible.

He shifts so he’s once more hovering above you, “Ready?” He whispers, his lips ghosting over your ear. You give a short nod, the anticipation killing you. You’ve thought about this for ages; the feel of his skin against yours, how he would stretch you, how he’d look thrusting into you. Alex teases your folds, collecting your wetness, he lets out a deep moan. A desperate whimper from you broke him out of his trance, he lines himself up, thrusting his entire length at once. He gives you a moment to adjust, before starting a slow pace.

Alex pulls almost completely out before slamming into you. You could already feel the jostle in your bones. He steadily watches himself move in and out, not wanting to miss a single movement. “Fuck, you’re so tight. I...want…” He trails off, shifting so one of your legs is over his shoulder. You were able to feel him even deeper, harder, each thrust sliding you towards the headboard, little by little. He pulls out, staring at his cock.

“Is everything okay?” You question, thinking you’ve done something wrong. Were you not doing enough? Did he realize he didn’t want to continue? Your thoughts were racing, hard to process one before another popped up in its place.

“No. I just… want to take this condom off.” His voice breathless and pleading. Instead of responding you lean over to take it off of him. “You don’t care?”

“No, I didn’t want you to use it in the first place, but didn’t know how you’d react.” You were sure the mood was ruined, that was until you saw Alex’s face. His eyes dark, his jaw clenched, his bottom lip caught between his teeth. He pushes you until you were lying on your back, throwing both of your legs over his shoulders, thrusting his entire length into you, hard, giving you no time to adjust. His pace was quicker, harsher, more determined to make you come. “God...you feel like heaven,” he growls, each word accompanied by a thrust.

He angles himself just right finding your g-spot. Alex becomes more ruthless, the only sounds in the room are his hips slamming into yours and heavy breathing. He has a tight hold on your hip, bruises surely forming. You know he’s reaching his high quickly, becoming clumsy, his breathing more labored. Using his other hand, he reaches down applying pressure to your bundle of nerves; almost immediately you clench around him. “Come for me YN.” Hearing those instructions pushes you over the edge. You’re clenching tightly around him, so much so he can barely move.

Even though neither of you wanted a condom between, Alex pulls out, stroking himself not wanting to risk anything. As quickly as you can, you maneuver so your face is level with his cock. You take control, taking most of him into your mouth, tasting your juices. You look up as best you could to see a look of disbelief. He places a hand on your head, wrapping your hair around his fingers, “So nasty.” It didn’t take long for Alex to come undone, spurts of come filling your throat. Once you were sure you swallowed every drop, you slowly let his length out of your mouth. Both of you stay still, wanting to cherish the moment.

Finally, you move so you’re sitting with your back against the headboard. Alex lays his head in your lap, wrapping his arms around your waist. You run your fingers through his hair admiring the softness. You wished he hadn’t cut it, but thought he looked lovely nonetheless. “Y/N, how long have you felt this way?”

“I...I’ve had feelings for a while. There were so many times I wanted to tell you, but I was terrified you wouldn’t feel the same then things would become awkward. Alex I didn’t want to lose you as a friend. I know it was a chance meeting, but A, we clicked almost instantly. For a while I let myself believe there was a chance of you feeling the same way, but the longer we were friends the more I began to think that’s all we’d ever be. You don’t know what it’s like to want someone astronomically out of your league. I didn’t want to make a fool of myself if you didn’t feel the same, it’s embarrassing to admit your feelings when there’s a chance the other person doesn’t reciprocate.”

Alex situated so he was looking up at you, “My pige, I’m not out of your league, not even a little. I see you as out of my league. I was afraid you only wanted me as a friend after all the comments I’d made trying to feel you out. You either were oblivious to them or talked yourself into believing you were reading too much into things. Or maybe I wasn’t being obvious enough. I feel like we’ve wasted so much time, we could have been doing this for months now. Don’t take that the wrong way, I love being your friend regardless. But that was...wow, it was better than I’d ever imagined.”

“You imagined us having sex?” This shouldn’t be shocking after the events that had just taken place but it made you feel sexy. It made you feel as if nothing could stop you. It showed you that Alex was a normal person just like anyone else, not as if you didn’t know that already.

“You have no idea. Oh god, especially when you wear leggings and act like you don’t know they make you look fucking gorgeous. So many times I wanted to just bend you over and smack your ass, show you the appreciation you deserve. But I also want to cuddle, protect you, and show you even more of the appreciation you deserve.”

He turns over so he can kiss the many marks he’d made tonight. He inches closer and closer to your core, his nose ghosting over it, teasing until he thought you couldn’t take it any longer, “Alex, if you keep doing that. We’re going to end up not leaving this bed.”

“What’s wrong with that?” His face between your legs before you can answer. You weren’t sure what would happen between the two of you. All you knew was the two of you weren’t leaving this bed anytime soon.

[smolbeandrabbles]

I Could Not Ask For More - Ralph Anderson x Reader (The Outsider)

Sure Be Cool If You Did / Bienvenue From Hell, Mon Amour / Made in the USA / Cold Night / Under The Weather

Author’s Note: This is a Sweet Anon Request!  I’m actually kinda surprised that this is my first Ralph request-! But I’m very happy that I got one! 🙊🙏💜

Thank you for requesting! I hope you enjoy 😘❤

Forewarning, a lot of book canon is used in this! 

I Could Not Ask For More - Sara Evans

Disclaimer: Lyrics not mine / idea not mine / The Outsider and all characters to Mr.Stephen King Our DA “Hayes” is once again ‘Samuels’ for consistency! 

Premise: When heavy rain prevents you from working a crime scene, you and Ralph return home - soaked - to see what you can salvage from the day...

Words: 6646

Warnings: soft-sweet-emotional-sex / fluff-and-sweetness / 1 instance of swears! / Book Spoilers ahoy! 

________

Lying here with you Listening to the rain Smiling just to see the smile upon your face These are the moments I thank God that I'm alive These are the moments I'll remember all my life I found all I've waited for And I could not ask for more Looking in your eyes Seeing all I need Everything you are is everything to me These are the moments I know heaven must exist These are the moments I know all I need is this I have all I've waited for And I could not ask for more I could not ask for more than this time together I could not ask for more than this time with you Every prayer has been answered Every dream I have's come true And right here in this moment is right where I'm meant to be Here with you here with me I could not ask for more than the love you give me 'Cause it's all I've waited for And I could not ask for more No, I could not ask for more

---

Ralph Anderson had been watching that rain cloud carefully for about an hour. The closer it got the darker it became - and although it was warm right now, he knew that downpour would hit in seconds. Both of you were still getting all the crime scene details - and that also made him uneasy because that rain would surely screw up all evidence. Which is why he’d encouraged the team to work faster. And also had you and him taking photographs of everything in sight. A trick and habit he’d certainly got into because of Holly Gibney. Also, he knew you’d offer a perspective he didn’t have. Still, that cloud was now at the forefront of his mind, his eyes flicked to you, crouched to study something else and then back to the rain. “Detective...” That immediately caused you to pay close attention to him, because Ralph usually called you by your name - making this a little more serious; “Yeah?” “Tell me you have a jacket...” You didn’t see what that had to do with anything, currently in a button up shirt and jeans; “Uhhh... no, why?” “Well I’m just looking at this rain and thinking you might need one.” You scoffed, “What rain!?” It was clear and sunny and warm, He pointed at the cloud “That rain!” You followed his point “Shouldn’t you be more concerned about the crime scene, Detective Anderson?” He shot you a look; “if I wasn’t so concerned about the integrity of the crime scene and the evidence - Detective Andersson - I wouldn’t have brought it up!!” “Oh my god...” you sighed under your breath, tipping your head and squinting at the horizon; “Well what, we’ve got a little while yet. And we have tents in the cars… We can set up and protect some crime scene integrity… and we have these!” You waved your camera “Yeah. Okay. Well we should probably do that I’m thinking the rain might be imminent!!” “Will you two get a room—!!” Yune now had a tune to go along with his favourite catch phrase as he smiled from the other side of the crime scene. Ralph turned the look he was giving you on Yune; “and just WHO’S side are you on!” Yune mused; “Oh, good point, maybe we should call the DA out and make it even.” Ralph laughed as you narrowed your eyes “You’re not even worth my retaliation!” That only made him look to you like you’d just proved his point, “That was retaliation enough... don’t worry sweetheart, Samuels is as good at defending you as he is prosecuting everyone else!” You pressed your tongue to the inside of your cheek but said nothing more. To which they shared a look, but Ralph knew he was probably the one to be getting an earful later.

 Ralph was right - of course - but it took all of five seconds to go from two drops to torrential. “So you didn’t bring this up earlier because WHY!!!?” You had to yell at him just to be heard “I did! I told you all to hurry up!” “You didn’t say why!!!” Actually, the faster you both ran back to the car – Yune hot on your heels after the three of you had hastily set up tents and plastic sheeting - the worse the rain got. By the time you actually got in the car you weren’t sure there was a part of you that wasn’t soaked. You were both breathing heavily and Ralph studied the rain frowning. You knew where his head was at; “You gonna be able to drive in this?” He gave a shrug; “Should be alright... I mean I fancy my chances. I am the more careful driver.” You knew he couldn’t help it; “Is there anything I can do right-!?” “Well...” Although Ralph’s smile was teasing as he tilted his head, he still got the exasperated reaction he wanted out of you. You’d have folded your arms to match your annoyance, but like you needed any more water to touch your clothes or skin; “Well, one thing’s for sure...” you looked down at your clothes “I can’t go back to the precinct looking like this.” “Seems like it a work from home day...” He mused, but then smiled “I don’t think this rain is gonna let up for quite some while...”

 Ralph drove so carefully home - and left you and Yune to discussing the crime scene over the radio. You didn’t miss any of his nervous glances to the clouds though. What had looked bad to begin with looked a lot worse now. There was no sign of clear sky anywhere - or even a lighter grey. When he pulled up in front of the house, after making sure on the radio Yune was also safely back at his, the rain was still heavy. “I mean at least we can see the front door...” Ralph took off his seat belt and turned to you “...you really didn’t bring a jacket-!?” You indicated to the rain; “Well did you expect this?!” And if he did why hadn’t he said anything-!? “No... but...” He fanned his jacket “I always like to be prepared...” Ralph shrugged out of it and held it out; “Here.” You were hesitent, looking from him to his jacket and back; “Ralph I-” “Take it!” He insisted “You’re gonna-!” “I already am...” He rummaged around for the house keys, “Just give me a couple of seconds...” Opening the car door a crack he surveyed the area and grimaced; “Ah...” “What?” “Could do with an elevated drive...” “Puddles.” “Better believe it...” Ralph sucked in a breath, and gave you a weak grin; “Okay, wish me luck...!”

 Before you could actually do so though he’d hopped out of the car, slammed the door and sprinted to the house - porch at least shielding him a little from the rain as he unlocked it. But you knew he’d still be soaking - worse now he’d let you borrow this... You held his jacket over your head and ran as quick as you could to the front door, which he swung open for you. “Ughhhh—!! That was awful—! Awful—!!!” You shuddered, glad to be out of it, and when Ralph ran his hands through his hair droplets of water cascaded everywhere. “God damn... that’s bad. That’s... that’s real bad...” then he laughed, “Shoes off, I don’t want water or mud in this house.” You scoffed; “Last time I recalled, it’s my house.” “Our house.” He pretended to be offended by that, but it was pretty true. He’d all but entirely moved out of his one floor bungalow, and only frequented that on occasions where he couldn’t be here. In all honestly that wasn’t often. Not now. Ralph used to do it when you went to see your parents - until you thought it was ridiculous for him not to remain here; you trusted him. You trusted him more than you trusted yourself. “Thank God for the summer break...” “I hope that was an ironic statement...” you pulled your shoes off, socks a considerably darker colour than when you put them on “Well I sure hope no-one decided to holiday here.” “In Flint City?!” You snorted, eyebrow raised; “come on Ralph.” “Hey-! You never know! Small town getaway!” “Oklahoma is a flyover state for a reason, babe...” “More fool them is what I say...!” He flashed a grin, pulling his own shoes off throwing his jacket onto the hooks; “Let’s get some heat going and this stuff in the wash...” “I don’t know about you... but before we do any of that, towels...” Water was certainly still running out of your hair - and you were sure if he ran his hands through his again it’d bring about the same result. “Ah...! No, she’s right on this one!” He followed you up the stairs, giggling at the way you walked. You eyed him; “These are uncomfortable now, okay-!” “Well don’t wear tight jeans-!” You scoffed “I don’t wear ‘em for me...” You pulled open your airing cupboard, gathering fresh towels and noticing that a trail of water droplets has already followed you up here. Aw, come on! Ralph eyes traced the outlines of your jeans that – thanks to them being wet and sticking to you – left very little to the imagination, with a small smile; “Oh, really? Who for? Samuels?” Just for that and earlier, you turned to him slowly, with a dreamy sigh; “Damn there’s nothing I wouldn’t wear for that DA. You never know, I might get called into his office... gotta look my best-!” You flashed a grin, “I know I encourage it, but, dang do I hate you taking like that sometimes-!” Ralph folded his arms with something akin to a pout “Why??!” You pushed him through into the bedroom with a stack of towels “Are you jealous?” “Might be.” “Of my hypothetical relationship with Samuels?” Ralph narrowed his eyes at you, and you leaned slightly back, eyebrows knitted in disbelief; “of Samuels-!?” He grumbled, but turned away from you like he wasn’t prepared to go all the way to admitting it. Which you thought might as well have been admittance in itself. “Well he’s-” “Come off it!!” You laughed, at least still joking with him, chucking a towel at his face, “I mean, you have seen yourself in a mirror, right-!?” When Ralph didn’t reply to you, and you thought he might actually be a little dejected by your joke everything changed, from your facial expression to your body language. Soft and open. You sighed sympathetically and turned his head back towards you with your fingertips. “Honey that’s not... no.” You shook your head firmly, “Just no.” And, as if you might also need to prove it with actions - you brought his face closer and leant in to kiss him.

 Ralph, not eager to break the kiss, discarded all but one towel on the bed and wrapping you in it to pull you tight into him with a hum of approval. You chose your next set of words very carefully between kisses; “And you should already know... that DA is way too young for me.” He tried hard not to laugh, and it came out as a stifled chuckle; “Isn’t he still, what, 5 years older than you?” “I think I made my point...” You reached for the towel, to push it back around his shoulders and away from his face; “I’m thinking we should probably dry off before we end up with colds in the middle of summer...” He tipped his head, “Well I’m not sure what you thought I was doing here...” You smiled sweetly; “What you always do...” “Oh yeah and what’s that?” “Look after me.” He gave another hmpf of approval, before smiling himself; “Glad you noticed.” There was total silence – save the rain still beating against the window pane - for a few minutes as the two of you dried each other off; how delicate he was with your face, tilting your head gently with his fingertips to make sure he’d got all the droplets before moving anywhere else – of course he’d also chosen the softest towel to do this with, and by the time he’d finished with your face you were both beaming and a healthy shade of pink. Ralph shifted strands of drying hair off your face gently, and nodded, satisfied with himself. You pulled yourself closer into him, using the towel still balanced around his shoulders to reciprocate – spending a little more time on his hair than he had on yours, he laughed sweetly as you continued to purposely mess it up, only to neaten it gently with your fingers afterwards, when it was damp like this his hair was super soft, and as if you didn’t like running your hands through it anyway…. He continued to watch your preoccupied little smile – before kissing the inside of your wrist, which only made you smile a little more – you paused at the look he was giving you. “…What?” It looked a little like concerned adoration – and you weren’t sure exactly which one he was aiming for. He barely shook his head; “…Nothing…” You tipped your head; “…Well, it’s something…” “…Yeah. Probably.” Ralph leant in and you offered no resistance to him pressing kisses to your forehead – where he lingered – the bridge and tip of your nose, and then reached your lips, pulling you flush against him. You looped your arms around his neck, unwilling to break that kiss, or his hold on you. But his hands slid from your waist to your shirt buttons, and he broke the kiss for you, head touching yours – you knew he was waiting for your approval, or maybe you’d push him away, but he’d listen. You figured that to get fully dry you’d have to shed the clothes eventually – and answered by pulling his lips back to yours. Ralph’s hands worked slow, almost tentatively, through your button-up before sliding the damp fabric from your shoulders. As his fingertips grazed your skin he wrapped you back in the cozy towel; you were still cool from the rain – and your shirt, nor his jacket, had saved you from quite literally being soaked through. Every kiss was lazy, minimal effort, maximum time, as he continued to relieve you of your clothes – but he didn’t let you escape his lips; or the fact that he was still concerned with keeping you warm and dry. His hands moved to your belt, and the soft chink every time the buckle fed through holes made you shiver in anticipation of hearing the same thing from his own belt. Ralph didn’t miss a beat, allowing you pause from his kisses only to place his lips to your neck instead. You tipped your head, laugh nearly breathless, as you took the initiative to work on his own shirt buttons – he’d given up his jacket for you, so Ralph was nearly as drenched and cold as you were. You’d make a joke about it not being good for his health. But it didn’t seem right in the moment. You tried to go as slowly as he was with you, but even he knew that wasn’t really in your nature – and didn’t discourage you. Far from it; his hands left you to assist pulling the long sleeves down his arms before his shirt hit the floor. He straightened for a second, allowing you a moment to watch the water droplets run from his shoulders and collar bone down his chest. You grabbed a larger towel and wrapped him up in much the same way as he had you; pulling him back to you by his belt. Leaning up to kiss him this time as you undid it. His hands were back on your skin; caressing your lower back – running higher just to allow you to throw his belt with yours. Ralph was at least glad to see you were warming up. You stepped back for a second, eyes searching his, giving yourself just a second – just one – to watch that blue. Given your capacity as his partner at work, and also his actual partner, you felt like you saw those eyes turn every shade under the sun at one point or another. Because despite the fact your personal relationship was never denied, your working relationship was worlds from this one – and Ralph was a completely different person. But this blue, and the way he looked at you now, this shade was your favourite. You could feel all your emotions stirring in your heart, and hoped that your eyes weren’t about to well up; how could you love one person this damn much? “I think it’s a good thing my baby isn’t home...” Your voice was quiet, to match the almost innocent look on your face. And you weren’t sure for which reason you were musing this. Just as looking at you, Ralph wasn’t sure why you always chose that gaze – he wasn’t so much one to think it was choice, but you always looked so vulnerable, and so in love. And he was just as in love with you. He knew that. “Mmmm, but then...” Ralph kissed you slow, enticing you back into his arms, “...Doesn’t mean we can’t make our own.” For half a heartbeat you weren’t sure he was serious, and it was probably a light-hearted statement. But he was. He meant that. “...Hmmm... change my last name first, and then we’ll talk.” “Change your last name by one whole letter?” He laughed, kissing you again, “Doesn’t sound too hard.” That only caused you to laugh back as you drew him in closer, arms back around his neck, hands running through his hair; “Ohhh... I think it’s gonna be harder than you think-!” “Well. Probably not as hard as it might be for me to peel you out of these jeans.” You gave a shrug; “Guess next time I’ll have to wear looser jeans. Good thing I’m in the mood to help you-!” With that Ralph lifted you from the floor, and you wrapped your body around his, he’d warmed up pretty quickly himself; and you buried your head in his shoulder for a second inhaling the scent of his skin. Whilst left a little Earthy by the rain, he smelt warm, inviting, clean, notes of his aftershave still clinging to him despite everything it’d been through today. You wanted to get soaked up in that yourself, and just melt into him. It wouldn’t be much longer until you got your wish… Ralph piled the towels neatly to one side before lying you on the bed gently, hands supporting you as you unravelled yourself from him. He stayed between your legs for a minute, running his fingers over your jeans; “…You’d think a detective might be able to do this…” “What do you want 3 attempts?” He chucked, shaking his head at your joke, before leaning forwards, placing his hands either side of you – planting another kiss to your forehead; “I think I’ve got this one…” You almost shivered in anticipation again as his hands, again slow, undid the button and zip on your jeans, you raised your hips as he looped his fingertips through the beltloops and tugged gently – seemed easier than he expected – and as he continued to bring them down your legs he pressed light kisses to your thighs, knees, calves and ankles. You helped kick them to the floor and he knelt up again, tracing his fingers absentmindedly up and down your lower leg as he watched you. You knew him too well to not know what he was doing; Ralph would never bring himself to say it out loud. But it was about the same thing you always would tell him.

What in the hell did I do… to deserve you?

 You beckoned him back to your lips, and he only denied you for a few seconds to discard his jeans with yours, before his hands were back either side of your head – you drew him into you, winding your arms around his strong shoulders, up his neck – hands tangling in his hair. He balanced his bodyweight on his left palm, running his right hand over your skin; his caress was gentle, down your neck he chased your pulse – over your collar bone and down towards your heart, spreading his fingertips in the direction of every major vein and artery that would run there. To feel that sturdy beat that made you. Your heart was strong, he knew that. It would have to be to love him. Ralph broke your kiss, pulling back barely an inch, his nose still brushing yours as his head tilted – those clear blue eyes beholding yours. Then they closed and he pushed his forehead to yours. His fingertips collected again, tracing the curve of your breast always touching just shy of where you wanted him to. But Ralph asked for nothing if not patience. He slowed, counting every rib as they passed under his hands, over the curve of your waist into your hip, over that strange little scar on your thigh that had never heeled properly. You’d told Ralph many a story about how you’d got it, but he wasn’t sure which one was real, if any – he suspected the real reason was mundane and embarrassing and you’d rather admit to anything else, but he allowed it – because your stories amused him. There was but one piece of fabric between you and him, and he eased your pants down your legs. He returned the trace of his hand to the back of your knee, pulling your leg up and over him – and holding you there for a moment. As if you’d move. Sometimes he had one or two habits that blurred between personal and professional – and making sure you stayed where he wanted you to was one of them. Ralph’s hand left you and came back to rest adjacent to his other and then his eyes reopened. “So, detective…” you breathed, “Your deduction is?” He kissed you gently again, his smile soft and beautiful – just like the voice he chose to answer with; “Perfect… as I knew you would be.” “…Careful, you might make me cry again.” You teased, reaching up to leave butterfly kisses all over his face. “Ah, no. That’s for later…” “We’ll see…” You murmured as he pressed his lips to yours again, hands sliding up and under his, lacing your fingers together. For a few moments you both watched each other breathe, without pulling out of that gaze. The rain seemed gentler now, the musical way it hit the windows and the roof much more casual. You smiled, more to yourself than to Ralph. You weren’t sure you’d ever made love to the sound of the rain before – at least not rain you could hear like this. You wanted to ask if he had – but that question could wait. Ralph nudged your left leg with his own tenderly, coaxing you to part them further; instead ending with you threading your leg with his. He very nearly chuckled, and that smile remained on his face as he shook his head at you – pulling a grin from you, and then a sigh from your lips. Your fingers slid from his, and your hands ran up his arms; he wasn’t muscular but he was toned and strong. To you he’d never seemed breakable; his stature would be intimidating enough, but Ralph didn’t often have a face to accompany that, and you certainly knew about it when he did. Still, you wouldn’t mess with the serious looking one with his hands on his hips, badge and gun on public display. You probably wouldn’t mess with you either, because it was a power stance that you copied; only you didn’t have Ralph’s height, and you were nearly always smiling. Still, when you got him out of his clothes his physique was as impressive as his presence was. You paused your right hand on his shoulder, but ran your left back into his hair, and he inclined his head to you slightly. The flicker of innocence that ran through his eyes and across his face asked you a question he didn’t have to voice, and you answered back in kind. Your breath in replaced a gasp, and your nails dug into him for barely a second. There was nothing new about this. Even before you’d shared your first time in bed together you knew Ralph Anderson was a warm safe place, that you could trust him, that you could hide here in his arms forever and he’d protect you or – quite literally – die trying. That was more than you could ever possibly ask for, and when he signed up for this he signed up for a daughter that wasn’t his. And Ralph loved her more than anything. And he was still here. So how could you ever explain in words what it was like to be one with him? With someone with the aura he had? It was a feeling you didn’t like losing easily – and one you could easily get drunk on.

 He relaxed his body, melting completely into you; he wanted his hands in your hair, your form against his, the warmth of your skin, the way your pulse ran or your feelings were betrayed with a subtle shiver of excitement, not only the sound of your breathing, sighing, the moans you tried to fight and keep to yourself – but the way it felt to cross his skin, or when it all became too much and you buried your face in his neck. Ralph spent so much time out in the field trying not to feel, to keep a level head – clarity in light of every situation he faced (before he had to try to reign you in too), that when he was with you he wanted nothing more than a sensory overload. However it was that he might get to feel that today – and this time the rain provided the perfect soundtrack. You wound your arms around his shoulders to envelope him as close as he wanted to be, tangling your legs with his. Everything about the way Ralph Anderson made love was exactly how he was usually – calm and quiet, and perfectly flawed in all the right ways. He was tough, resilient and protective, and he liked it most when his body was covering yours; like the way if anything ever got tense he’d take at least half a step in front of you. But also the kind to snark you into the next century if the occasion called for it, and every so often you’d get a remark with a quirked eyebrow and the smile that matched, instead of his quietly sighed I love yous. Ralph’s shoulders also had a habit of clicking every so often and either he’d pause for a moment to make sure it was fine – or you’d try and fail to hold your laughter in. All facets of a great relationship, at least you could say that. Mercifully, not today, and as you wound yourselves around each other, Ralph moved. Slow barely covered it, but the friction of his body against yours already had you sighing his name. You heard his barely murmured chuckle, and knew in the back of his mind was a sentence he couldn’t bring himself to say. But you knew your blissful answer was yes, yes I want you that bad, dammit! His rhythm was slower still – but this was the one time that Ralph ever lost himself, and allowed himself to do so. You didn’t think that he ever completely switched off, but lost in you was as close as he got to truly gone. But you were selfish, and all you wanted was to keep him with you; and every pull back was too much like him leaving you. And you held him tighter, so close that now he really could feel your heartbeat on his skin. He kissed your forehead gently again, untangling his fingers from your hair he held his hand out patiently for yours, and you laced them together. “…Ralph…” He upticked the pace just enough for your name to spill from your lips – the rest of your sentence already forgotten as his lips covered yours. You couldn’t let him go – you never, ever wanted to let him go. And he wanted you to hold him just as bad, he would be the first one to say he was protecting you, but with you wrapped around him like this he knew the way around it really was. This was the only time he got you this still. But even now your heart was beating fast. That heart that loved him, that he would ask no more from than that, but you willingly gave anyway. Strong and wild and untameable – just like you. And yet, you were here with him. Your legs tightened around his, as you pulled him into you deeper and deeper – and his groan of your name against your lips made you sigh in response. Until finally his rhythm hit you just right – and your sharp gasp and instant arched reflex left you flush against him once more. “…Baby…” The word was broken, almost panted, “Ralph… Please…” Don’t stop, not now, right there. Even his chuckle was sweet, but nearly silent, blown across your skin by his breath. “I love you…” and that one wasn’t silent, “Y/N… I love you.” And he didn’t stop, pace up another notch now he’d found what you wanted he had you completely at his mercy. And yet his willingness to be patient and gentle meant that you were kept on the edge of ecstasy far longer than anyone should be allowed to be. “Baby, please…” His kisses transferred to your neck, barely grazing your skin as he teased you. That helped nothing, and this time you whined his name – groan reverberating through your throat and body and into his. That’s exactly what he wanted, that complete sensory overload. And his quiet moan of your name was nowhere near as quiet as he wanted it to be. Ralph was suddenly hyperaware of every feel of your body, the way the sweat was dancing on your skin, and gathering along his shoulder blades. Every tiny tense of your body to match every movement of his. And the way it felt to be inside you. That most of all.

Your body curved so perfectly with his, and your warmth and love were felt at every point of contact - because maybe you’d never admit it but you clung to him as desperately as he did you - holding him not nearly as near as you wanted him. As if there were any way for the two of you to be closer. And every little tiny sigh of happiness or vibration that ran through your body told this detective everything he ever needed to know. And Ralph always acted accordingly; making love with him was never the same twice. Because he listened to your body, and when the tune changed, he reacted quicker than you would think any man would. You burned for him; passion and desire – that wild and free spirit of yours – mixed with a delicate softness that made you unfathomable. You knew when to be either; but sometimes when he held you in his arms, in the especially intimate moments you were both at once. And the rush of what that felt like to him – both physically and emotionally went straight to his head. The problem was his body reacted to that shot – and your body reacted to his. “Sh----!” His thrust was a little too hard, and tension raced right through you. And now you couldn’t fight back against it. DAMN HIM-! You closed your eyes once more, arching your back, nails digging into his skin – which he was still painfully aware of – each cry of his name now more and more desperate; “Ralph-! Ralph-! Oh-! Baby-! Please-!” And he couldn’t help but smirk, because all of those sounds were his and for him; and suddenly all he could hear was the rain, like white noise, and you saying his name, voice pitching to that shaky high which could only mean one thing. Fuck! You always went from pitched to silent – high far too much to ever vocalize, you’d blame him entirely for that of course. But maybe everyone else just wasn’t this good. Maybe this was what it felt like to be with the one person you were made for? How could you answer something like that for yourself? But that rush of ecstasy that had you breathing fast and hard was always followed by an inescapable rush of heat; and your body quivered in its need to relax, and in intense pleasure and happiness. Which is about the time you tipped Ralph over the edge. His cry of your name was breathless and raspy, and his grip on you tightened, nails grazing your skin only making you shudder once again – which almost had him cursing. One day you’d get him to say one out loud and you’d get to tease him endlessly. But you knew the look on his face and that was enough, when he opened those gorgeous eyes and they were burning that little bit brighter. Ralph leant forward, breathing heavily, but smiled soothingly, as his lips found yours again, it was a sweet short kiss, before he pressed a second to your forehead, and then sat back for a moment, head tipped; “Are you crying?” “Shut up! This always happens-!” That one you’d also blame him for, and you’d never quite been able to stop your tears from running at the overwhelming mix of emotions you felt. You moaned gently as he withdrew from you, gathering your hands back in his; “Better be cuz it was actually kinda good, rather than my poor performance.” You gave him a tiny shove; “I said shut up-!” Cocky bastard! You were panting, still, but that look on his face had you laughing “Ahhhh---!” He grinned, “You just can’t stay mad at me can ya!?” “I’m not mad-!” you laughed again, “Now come back here and kiss me, Mr. Anderson!” He looped his strong arms back around you, pulling your body closer to his and hitting the sheets; “I suppose I might happily oblige your request, M’am.” “Oh my god…” You rolled your eyes, but your giggles still rose in your chest as you rested your head to his. Ralph allowed you to settle in the crook of his neck, running a hand through your hair as he caressed your back, kissing the crown of your head. “…I love you, Y/N…” “Oh, don’t you say that now…” You closed your eyes, one hand against his heartbeat, the other draped lazily around his body, “…I shouldn’t like to ask you to prove it twice…” He chuckled, “You’d call that proof, huh?” “…What, you want me to present you with a board of evidence…?” You couldn’t help your sarcastic grin “Aw come on, I’m not Samuels.” “Damn right.” You pressed a kiss to his collarbone; “You’re mine.”

 *** You whined as Ralph untangled himself from the sheets and your body; “No… Nooo…” “Shhhh…” He brushed his lips to your forehead gently, “I’ll be back, wait here…” Pulling on his sweats he wandered over to his wardrobe and gathered an armful of clothes. You watched him with curiosity as he then collected the wet items from the floor in his other arm and turned back to you, “Give me a few minutes.” You gasped, sitting up; “Are you warming up your clothes in the dryer--!?” “Mhm. And I’ll put the washing on whilst I’m at it.” Like he’d promised about 2 hours ago You gasped again; “OH! You’re perfect!” He couldn’t help but chuckle, and then winked; “Exactly, you would be so lucky as me removing that second ‘S’ from your last name.” You shook your head after him, but didn’t retaliate as you propped yourself up in the pillows and drew the duvet around yourself. It took a little longer than his 5 promised minutes; and during that time you heard the front door and car door both open and close again, making you huff after you’d just spent all that time getting him warm and dry. There was further shuffling around downstairs, and eventually Ralph appeared again. “You went back outside-!?” “Yeah… Washings on…” He glanced to the window, “I just thought seen as we really ought to be working from home… I wanted to make sure we were working. I just set up to print off crime scene photos… Here!” He threw you a bar of chocolate; “This should help.” “Aw… babe…” You immediately scored through the foil wrapper, and snapped the first line, waiting patiently for him to return to you. Instead Ralph kept his eyes on the rain; “How is it?” “Calming down. Still pretty bad… I mean, it’s gonna be a close call but I don’t think it’ll wash Flint City away.” He gave you a cheeky grin You laughed to yourself; “Yeah okay – fine. Now get your workaholic butt back in bed.” He obliged, pulling you into his arms – “Okay… But then I mean it, we work.” “…Yes, Detective.” He kissed your hair, as you took a small bite of a square and held one out to him; “Ah, honoured.” “Well, you’re the one risking life and limb in flooding for a camera to print scene photographs. I think you deserve it.” He huffed gently, “Alright, that’s enough from you-!” but he took the square, “…Thank you. I know it’s your favourite…” “Nah…” You smiled gentle, kissing his cheek as he chewed thoughtfully “You’re my favourite.”

***

It was a little later when you were curled up on the couch reviewing the photographs together, you lying between Ralph’s legs – his arms around you - in his shirt and sweats, cozy and warm from his quick thinking. He was dressed about the same, and wasn’t putting nearly as much effort into this as you both thought you aught to. But a lot of what you both said was just attentive enough. You had to pretend you weren’t listening to his heartbeat, and weren’t feeling that tingle through your body every time his voice mused something in your ear as he decided to say it out loud. And he could pretend he wasn’t paying too much attention to the way your body still fit so perfectly with his and the way you were still breathing – like he still had you beneath him. Though Ralph wasn’t stupid; he knew that he was still driving you wild. The rain was lighter now, and its rhythm much more comforting, providing a nice background noise to your half-baked crime scene analysis. No doubt Yune would have something to say about that tomorrow – but tomorrow was another day, and right now Ralph Anderson knew loving on you was far more important. He placed a kiss to the back of your neck, and the shiver that ran through you again almost caused you to drop the group of pictured in your hands; “Not helpful-!” The look you received told you he was hardly aiming to be. Before he sat up, a little more attentive, and his eyes brightened; “Oh! It’s performance review season!” “Ugh!” You covered your face “I’m dreading it to be honest!” Ralph chuckled “Why? You can’t do any worse than the guy you took over from!” Then mused; “Well I guess he wasn’t my partner but... close enough.” “You mean the guy that tried to kill you in Texas? That you then shot.” “Jack Hoskins, that’s the one!” You folded your arms; “Oh yeah? Why? What did you say about him!” Ralph pretended he had to think about it long and hard - “Two words, I believe: No Opinion.” “No op-!” You covered your face to hide your cackle, with little success; “Oh my god! No wonder he tried to kill you!!” Ralph laughed and nudged you; “Yeah alright!” Then folded his arms, “if you’re lucky you might get a “she’s alright” out of me. I think I could stretch to that-!!” You scoffed “Oh alright, screw you!” He tipped his head indecisively; “Ah, well sure - if you wanna go back upstairs...” “What-!? No-! Ralph-!!” Though that set you off laughing, “What happens if I agree, does that entice a better review out of you?” He grinned, pulling you back into his arms, you knew he was quite willing to carry you back up those stairs, and right now you were very okay with that prospect; “Okay-! I’ll stretch to five words-! She’s pretty good I guess!”

---

@menndelsohn​ @3134045126​​ @happyskywhale​ @wltz-bby​ #MendoTagSquad

[sornasaur]

Aeron: “Pfft. I see you, Honey. I bet you couldn’t focus on feeling good with that hot water bottle laying on your stomach, hm?~” 👀

Yuki: “How tragic.~ Guess you gotta rub one out tomorrow.” ✌🏼🤣

Ryuu: “Tch. No one to blame but youself for consuming dairy thus making your cramp ten times worse.” ಠ_ಠ

Me: “WELL EXCUSE ME PRINCESS! How the fuck was I supposed to know that my ten day late period was gonna start while I was playing Just Dance today?” 😒

Jun: “Oop she got you there Yuu.~” 🥴

Yukio: “So you have time to do this but not enough to actually take care of us?” 🙄

Me: “I suggest you shut the fuck up Yukio and get back to me when we get the sixth student otherwise I ain’t waking you bitchass punks up.” ✌🏼😗

Ryuu & Yukio: “.../...”

Aeron: *Covering his mouth with one hand while his back is turned to them* “Serves you both right.” 👀

Jun & Yuki: *Shaking their heads slightly while stifling their laughter* “Oop she’s savage today, I guess that period coming in late really got you mad huh?” “Better switch the water in your hot water bottle then hm? We’ll make sure Ryuu and Go don’t cause anymore eggshells to be stepped on. Maybe play some Fall Guys or Minecraft.”

Ryuu: “Tch. Don’t be a brat.” *Crosses his arms with another click of his tongue* “Don’t push yourself too hard today or the next few days, brat. I know this sucks ass but you can power through it like you usually do.” *Uncrosses one of his arms and ruffles my hair before crossing his arm again and walking over to Yuki*

Yukio: “Well.. I am not apologizing.” *Puts hands behind his head with an unamused gaze my way* “Go drink more of your cramp tea later if it gets too bad and your hot water bottle doesn’t work anymore, dumbass.” *Turns around with a huff and soon crosses his arms before looking over his shoulder* “I don’t want you coming back to us with your panties in a bunch because your cramps are kicking your ass, got it? ...Maybe you can if that’s what you really want. We’ll be here always if you do.” *Sprints off after uncrossing his arms with a faint tint to his cheeks as Yuki, Aeron and Jun watch on while laughing at him*

Me: “Aw you do care, ‘Kio!~ I’m so touched.~” ☺️ “I should really go switch out my lukewarm water then play some Fall Guys or Minecraft as I can’t get off right now ughhhh I hate my body when it’s in the h0rny state still.” 😩

[tomiyeee]

finished the story quests for bl3 (but barely any of the side missions yet) and i got...Opinions(tm)

(sorry if this doesn’t cut on mobile! also if you want to hide spoilers i’m tagging all my bl3 posts as “bl3 spoilers” so ny’all can blacklist it)

in no particular order:

i honestly wanted to give gearbox some slack and try my best to like this game bc i know people had probably unfairly high expectations for this game given all the build up, but they really just kept letting me down in everything but the graphics

said this before but overall, the characters are all Quite lackluster

^^ tyreen and troy included. adding the word "bitch" to every sentence does not automatically make it funnier

that being said, i super love their backstory + relationship with typhon/nekofeyo-whatever

the character designs are equally boring. moxxi was the only one who got a real improvement imo. lilith and maya are okay. rhys...i dont think i have to explain. lia...i dislike her hair; the black felt like it balanced out her design better and the white streak was interesting and cool but full white just looks bad tbh. zer0 feels less sleek and more bulky which doesnt fit him much. tina lost her pretty color palette and cute outfit. where are all the bright pretty color palettes in general???? there are other colors besides brown and black???? use them?????

ending of pre-sequel: “you will need all the vault hunters you can get” me: “ooh does that mean all the vh’s from previous games are back? i can’t wait to see everyone meet each other! :D” bl3: only nine of them come back, 3 of them die, the rest are involved in maybe one mission at most

boss fights. super. boring. and tedious. i mean this could be partly because i was playing on ps4 which made it extra not fun but if the only reason the fight is difficult is because they have a lot of health...it's not fun or challenging. i want fights like handsome jack with interesting mechanics. i want fights like angel with emotional impact. i want fights like the pre-sequel final boss that i forgot the name of with variation that isnt just "now they have an attack that shines bright lights in ur eyes, covers the whole arena, and can knock you down in one hit im looking at you traunt and killavolt". tyreens fight was the only one that i somewhat enjoyed because of this. all the others were just like "ughhhh again?"

im really enjoying melee amara playstyle. taking out badass enemies in four hits is my jam. this is just my fallout 4 playthrough all over again babey heck yea

typhon just wanted to be a good dad!!! he called tyreen starlight which is adorable!!! he did the best he could and tyreen hated him for it!!! i don’t blame either of them for that tbh, it makes sense from both their perspectives. tyreen definitely should have been more understanding, but she’s a dick so :/ (not saying this is a writing flaw, just a character flaw)

hammerlock needs higher standards in men but i really appreciate the undeniably in-your-face "fuck you" to all gamer dudes

i really. hate. how little the player character seems to matter in the story. in pre-sequel the vh's all had unique dialogue AND npcs would respond, sometimes even with character-specific lines. even when it was the same across vh's, it still felt like the npcs were interacting and speaking directly to them. the player character felt like a character of their own, rather than just a vessel for the player to do quests and kill enemies with or an errand runner for the important characters. i thought that was the direction they were going in with bl3 too but this just feels like bl2 only worse. there’s a separation again between you and the story and it feels like you’re just watching things happen. now ur not just a silent protagonist, but instead your a speaking protagonist who gets completely ignored. whats the point of including unique dialogue if it's not even acknowledged beyond an "uh-huh, moving on"?

sometimes the logic just feels kinda dumb. the twins killed/disabled maya and lilith in a heartbeat, they can literally disintegrate the most powerful beings in the universe, but the vault hunters? absolutely not. they must fight them for 40 minutes and then die.

after the fight with troy, no one even touched tyreen. there's no way they could have thought "yup she's definitely dead, no need to shoot her in the head or anything just to make sure. we didn't do anything to even hurt her, we just assumed." turns out she's 100% alive and gets up to start the apocalypse. who'da thunk! i know they wanted the end to seem more dramatic but it just seems stupid that they could have stopped tyreen like 5 missions earlier had they even the slightest bit of common sense.

lilith was one of the biggest threats to tyreen and troy's whole plan. of course they should leave her alive and simply steal her powers. let's kill the monk siren instead.

i know they didn't include this to give all players a fair experience instead of favoring sirens, but it kinda sucks playing a siren character and it's just completely ignored outside of ur action skill. tyreen and troy are sapping siren powers left and right, but they choose to leave you with yours. when you enter the eridian place with typhon tannis starts glowing because it has "something to do with sirens". what about the one standing right next to her? this applies to bl2 as well...jack i would willingly charge ur vault key for u pls why do u take lilith instead :'(

oh yeah speaking of tannis! i LOVE that she got angels powers. for some reason it just makes me really happy. maybe it's bc i think it's sweet that part of angel survived. maybe it's because it makes for cool fanart. maybe it's just cool. idk. also like that we got a solid explanation of what angel's powers were (influence over technology). i always thought her having control over it in bl2 might've been cuz it was hyperion tech and she had access to it same as she had access to the satellite from bl1. it wasn't super clear since it seemed like she could also materialize things like the ammo during her fight.

that also reminds me: all the dramatic reveals in this game felt kinda badly done.

the very first one with zer0/katagawa. like the whole time i was walking around looking for him i was trying to think why he might've turned/something must have happened to him or rhys. everyone was saying it was undeniably zer0. i finally meet him and take one look at his bright ass maliwan armor and its like. really. you couldnt have made it anymore obvious that thats not zer0. and then his helmet gets knocked off and surprise! it's not him. i totally didnt already figure that out with one glance 10 seconds ago. (maybe even earlier when you got glimpses of him around the building but i always missed it cuz i was looking at the fish tanks n shit)

also the tannis reveal. she was speaking to me in the same way that only known siren characters could. weird unexplained things were happening and seemed to be related to tannis. i wonder if she's a siren? surprise! she's a siren.

tyreen and troy knew about the great vault through some unknown means. typhon was talking about having a son and a daughter who he told stories about the great vault. typhon calls tyreen his daughter a while later and lilith acts surprised like honey ur a little slow, i figured that out several lines ago.

basically i'm not saying they were so obvious that i knew from the beginning of the game; i only figured them out a little before they were outright stated. but it was enough that it kinda ruined the effect and the characters acting surprised only when it was blatantly spelled out for them just made it annoying.

i feel like most of this is pretty negative, but i don’t mean that i hate the game and was miserable playing it. it was honestly okay...like i said i wanted to like it, but gearbox hates me specifically and killed/ruined all my faves just to spite me sooo...*waves hand back and forth in a sort of “ehhh” gesture*. i think my opinion on bl games from most to least fav would be: tftbl, bltps, bl2, bl3, and bl1. so it’s not the worst, but deeefinitely not one of my faves. i mean jack’s not in it (or if he is he doesn’t have a big role) so it’s already at a huge disadvantage. the ending was ok, it was all dramatic n stuff and it kinda makes sense i guess, but it was just about as okay as the rest of the game really. i don’t hate it but it’s not great either yknow?

[raw-ugh]

February 18, 2020

DAMNNNNNN its been a long ass time since i last wrote on here. A LOT has changed. sooooo i have a new boy (shocker). we’ve known of each other for awhile now but we didn’t become friends until i started my new job back in august. since we work together we started talking more and getting closer. we also go to the same school so that’s how we knew of each other. i thought he was cute for awhile and we would flirt here and there but it was nothing serious and kinda oblivious flirting. we started talking more towards the end of me and the last boy i was basically dating back towards the end of november. we hung out in the beginning of december and he went out to the bar with another coworker of ours and got drunk and he kissed me while we were both drunk. it was very unexpected but i liked it. he ended up sleeping over and it was very innocent. we were talking pretty much daily for a week or two before this happened as friends and after that night. after that night we started hanging out more and whenever we would get drunk we would be real flirty and kiss and be cute. he wasn’t sure if i liked him or if i was just being that way with him because i was drunk. we never really brought any of that stuff up for awhile. then that guy i had a thing with for months graduated and he invited me to his graduation party. i left him on read. i didn’t want to go because i had some resentment towards him like just wondering why he would put in so much effort just for me to be another girl he was fucking, ya know? then comes the day of his grad party and he sends me the info for his party again. i left him on read again. i had been talking to my current boy all day the day of his grad party and he was going since he’s his frat brother. then i was considering going just because i wanted to see my boy. then the guy who’s grad party it was messaged me a little later and asked if i was coming. i told him maybe because i had work early the next morning. i ended up going. i was with my current boy all night and my old boy was getting a little jealous. i had heard he was upset because i was talking to all his friends and not him, but i was mad why would i want to talk to him after he played me like that? but anyway shortly after his party, me and my current boy hung out and he came over and we baked cookies and talked and he told me he liked me and i told him i liked him too. a few days later we went to the city and spent the whole day together and it was really cute. my feelings for him were getting stronger by the day. then he went to mexico to study abroad for 2 weeks and i went on a cruise for a week during the same time as his trip. he still made an effort to talk to me every day even though he was in mexico. when he came back, we hung out and it was so cute. then school started and he started sleeping over a bunch. we had never done anything sexual until he started sleeping over. we still haven’t had sex but he’s fingered me and ate me out and sucks on my titties, which i love. but one thing i find weird is that whenever i go to touch his dick he always seems to move my hand and says “you’re funny” and i’m just like ??? you can do things to me but i can’t do them to you??? it makes no sense. the other night he came over and he kept teasing me and would put his hand in my pants and finger me and lick my pussy and then be like “okay lets go watch the movie” and did that multiple times and i was like ?? you’re acting like we’re gonna have sex but then say “lets go watch the movie” like wtf? i was getting annoyed and made a comment and it was obvious i was annoyed. he kept saying he was sorry and said that he just really doesn’t want to mess anything up because he really likes me. i felt bad. i don’t want to rush him if he’s not ready. i don’t know what his sexual history is like or if he hasn’t really had much sex and he’s scared that he won’t be good or something but awhile ago when we were talking about a tv show and the character only lasted 8 seconds i straight up told him that practice makes perfect. no one is just good at sex the first few times they have it. it takes practice. and it’s always different having sex with a new person. you gotta get used to the person and know what they like. sex is always better when there’s feelings involved and the feelings are mutual. one night we had a conversation and he told me that he compares himself to my old boy since he knows about it. it broke my heart. they’re completely different people and they can’t even be compared. he’s so much better tho. i’m so comfortable with him and i can be my authentic self around him. he never makes me question how he feels about me. although it does kinda bother me that things are still kinda secretive. like obviously there are a lot of people who know about us and i’m not saying that everybody needs to know because they don’t but i guess i just wanna be shown off a little. for the longest time my toxic ex stopped showing me off. the guy i was with for months never showed me off. then the last guy i was with never really showed me off either which is whatever but i guess it would be nice since things feel real with him. back in december a girl we work with started having assumptions about us. she ran her mouth to a bunch of people at our job about us trying to figure things out. we work with his mom and she even asked his mom about us which i think is ridiculous. other people we work with also said that we would be a cute couple. he also spent valentine’s day together and it was cute. and the other day his mom asked him who he worked with and he told her and when he said my name his mom said “oh your girlfriend” then she said “i think i intimidated her the other day” which she did!!!! i had to go over to the side that she works at and give a client’s money to the supervisor but she wasn’t there and his mom was like “well i’m not her and i don’t have the safe soooo” and i was like “ahhhh okay i’m sorry”. her sarcastic tone had me overthinking everything and i was like “she hates me” especially since the first time i met her she was like “nice to meet you i know all about the drunken escapades” and i wanted to die lmao. and then the same day she said those things to him he said she went into his room and said “ya know if i’m gonna be her mother in law she better get used to it” and i was like omg she hates me. then he told me she’s just protective over him he’s her first born blah blah blah. then he said she told him awhile ago that since he’s her baby she’s never gonna like any girl he’s with but like ughhhh that shit is so important to me!!! i really hope that once she knows and gets to know me that will change. he told me he wants to tell her about me. i’m kinda nervous. my mom knows about us a bit because he’s come over to my mom’s house to hang out with me. my dad doesn’t know yet. he probably won’t know for awhile because things gotta be serious before he meets my dad. i know my dad will like him and approve of everything because he is the most wonderful guy and such an upgrade from my ex. my dad hated him. but things seem to be going really good with him and i’m just hoping that they continue to go well. i really like him. okay that’s it. that’s the update in my life. 

[anjibooks]

The Faithful & The Fallen by John Gwynne (Book Review)

Epic fantasies have always been right down my alleyway, and boy, this series definitely falls into that category. My cousin and I are both fantasy lovers, so we agreed on a book exchange-- buying each other the first book in a series and then promising to read the book that we were given. He bought me Malice, book one in the epic high fantasy series. And I'll be the first to admit that it took me a while to actually get around to reading it. As with many high fantasy series, the first book started out rather slow, in fact from what I recall the whole book was pretty slow. Like any good high fantasy, it really had to establish the world and the characters in the first book so we can really get to the good stuff in later books with a strong grasp on the world and also an attachment to the characters. This is exactly what Malice does. The first few chapters of Malice are very slow. I remember reading those at a very busy time in my life and then putting the book down as it just didn't seem worth using the time to force myself through. Then back around spring break I actually sat down to finish it. Yes, I'll be the first to admit that these books are a hefty commitment, emphasis on hefty because wow those are fat books to be carrying around, but trust me, they're actually really worth what can only be described as an epic length. While the Faithful and the Fallen doesn't fall into an absolute favorites category, I can promise you they are enjoyable reads that will suck you in with an intriguing plotline and fascinating world. Overall I'd give the series 7/10 stars. I did end up binging out on the last three books after finally finishing the first. It's like the first is the giant scale up the mountain, and the rest you're on a sled going down the other side of Everest. Though they are riveting reads, I have to admit there are some very prominent flaws with the stories that really irked me, especially after finishing the series, but more on that later. I would highly recommend this series to anyone who has a love for epic high fantasy stories, the kind with individual storylines that eventually intertwine. There's war, lots and lots of war, high stakes, and some intriguing mythology. Anyway, if you're interested here's a little overview on what this series is about. It's actually pretty hard to explain without giving anything away since the scope really expands more and more after the first book, but I think it's pretty safe saying that the story starts out with four main characters-- or really three main characters and one almost main side character: Corban, Veradis, Nathair and Evnis. Corban is a peasant boy, dreaming of the day he turns fourteen so that he can join the training to become a soldier. (If you're thinking wow that's young, I don't really want to be reading a middle grade novel-- don't worry! Not a middle grade novel, and A LOT of time passes over the course of these books (which makes sense seeing how gargantuan they are). Corban ages quite a lot throughout). Veradis is a skilled soldier, who befriends Nathair-- a prince with big aspirations and plans for the future. And Evnis... well, I'll let you see about Evnis. These are only the MAIN characters of the first book, there are a lot more characters and storylines woven in throughout the next novels. Anyway, that was a sucky synopsis so here's a real one: A black sun is rising … Young Corban watches enviously as boys become warriors under King Brenin’s rule, learning the art of war. He yearns to wield his sword and spear to protect his king’s realm. But that day will come all too soon. Only when he loses those he loves will he learn the true price of courage. The Banished Lands has a violent past where armies of men and giants clashed shields in battle, the earth running dark with their heartsblood. Although the giant-clans were broken in ages past, their ruined fortresses still scar the land. But now giants stir anew, the very stones weep blood and there are sightings of giant wyrms. Those who can still read the signs see a threat far greater than the ancient wars. Sorrow will darken the world, as angels and demons make it their battlefield. Then there will be a war to end all wars. High King Aquilus summons his fellow kings to council, seeking an alliance in this time of need. Some are skeptical, fighting their own border skirmishes against pirates and giants. But prophesy indicates darkness and light will demand two champions, the Black Sun and the Bright Star. They would be wise to seek out both, for if the Black Sun gains ascendancy, mankind’s hopes and dreams will fall to dust. Things I loved about these books: the plot and the character development. These are really plot and character driven books. And trust me when I say they have truly FANTASTIC plots and character development. Seriously if you compare the characters from the first book with the last book you'd think they're completely different people. And you got to travel along on that journey to see them become those different people. That's pretty amazing-- getting to see all the choices and key moments that lead to different things. Like a fearful cowardly boy growing into a courageous leader. With its huge cast of characters, this series really provides great and interesting perspective. And the plot? That's explosively good. Like I love all the planning with that and the intertwining mythology. To go along with the plot, the action is really well written and will keep you on the edge of your seat, really putting you right there on the battlefield with all your favorite (and least favorite) characters. Things I did not like about these books: the relationship development. While the plot and the characters are great, the way the relationships are written and built up to just isn't satisfying. Like, you can see that a lot of time has passed so it makes sense for those connections to have been made-- definitely not an instalove connection, but it almost feel likes instalove because you never get to see the small moments building up to those relationships becoming a relationship. I'm not just talking romantic, I'm also talking just about friendships and connections in general. Basically what you get to see with the relationships is the very beginning of each one, maybe a couple of words hinting at whatever in the middle and then the fully formed relationship at the end. What's really missing is that middle bit, the building part that helps the reader to really grow attached to said relationship. Because of that, there weren't many created relationships that I much cared for throughout the story. The relationship building definitely takes a backseat to the plot, which leaves me feeling a bit empty seeing as a truly satisfying action/fantasy story has a good balance of both. It's been so long since I read the series that I honestly couldn't tell you what my favorite book is, it's either Valor or Ruin (Book 2 or 3), but I can't remember which. They're both good-- actually they're all good, so it's really hard to remember which one stood above the other. My favorite characters would have to be Cywen and Storm, though I did like Veradis (I sorta see him as a sweet puppy in my eyes haha) and Corban. (SLIGHT SPOILER AHEAD, LOOK FOR NEXT PARENTHESIS FOR END OF SLIGHT SPOILER IF YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW MY LEAST FAVORITE CHARACTER) My least favorite character, without question would be NATHAIR. Seriously, I despised him throughout all the books. I was always waiting for him to have some sort of redemption in my eyes, but he never redeemed himself to me. The amount of texts I sent my cousin ranting about him is probably absurd. Seriously, I think I remember saying something about wanting to push him off a cliff just high enough to break all his bones but not kill him so that he would just have to lie there dying. Anyway... More on that in the spoilery section of the review just so that you know... I don't spoil everything for you. (SPOILER OVER) Anyway, those are my thoughts on this series! If you're interested in the slightest, don't be afraid to pick Malice up! And if you're bored during Malice JUST PUSH THROUGH IT. It'll end up worth it, I promise you that. SPOILERS FOR THE ENTIRE SERIES I'm sorta lazy so I'm just gonna copy and paste some of my texts to my cousin about this series haha. (About the disappointment in the lack of showing relationship development) "Like Fidele and Maquin... You don't really get to see the development... You see them meeting and you know they travel together and all the sudden they're in love and willing to sacrifice anything for each other. You know it's happening in the background but there's no good lead up." ​ "Or Veradis and Cywen. You know they travel together and have been talking but you don't actually get to see any of it." Interesting fact: Veradis and Cywen were actually the only relationship that I actually did fall in love with. the rest I didn't really actually feel much connection to. I spent MANY late nights saying I'd read till the next Cywen chapter, or saying I'd read until they reunited... Only that took a VERY long time haha. And then much to my irritation-- actually anger-- there was never actually any good romantic pay off, despite the fact that I waited two long books for them to reunite and then when they do NOTHING HAPPENS. They barely interact. UGhhhh. Here's a cleaned up text that I sent about that "And I'm also pretty pissed about Veradis and Cywen. I literally wait two and a half giant books for them to be reunited and when they do nothing happens. Then at the end of the book I'm like cool, maybe some interaction? Nope. They still don't get together. It's strongly implied they WILL because they think about each other so often, but nothing actually occurs. Just another example of how the plot revolves around all just action as opposed to having some focus on the characters' relationships with each other." And on my opinion on the finale: "Very epic, had fun reading it BUT as a finale I was a bit disappointed. Right after this huge epic battle it just feels rushed to finish it-- I'm not left with the closure I was expecting and feeling like I needed. Perhaps an epilogue would have done the book good as it would help wrap up some loose ends and leave me a little more satisfied." And if you're wondering about my Nathair hatred. Wow. That's an endless well to be diving in to. In fact, I'm not even going to post the majority of my texts about them seeing as they are pretty evil with LOTS of cursing haha. I just thought Nathair was so full of himself, on a power high for the majority of the first few books. I really was looking forward to seeing all of that come crashing down, and when it did I thought it might open the door for some great character development that might actually lead me to liking him. Unfortunately... when it came crashing down for Nathair it didn't matter because HE STILL CHOSE TO BE A DICK. UGh. Also I was hoping for MORE from his death scene since he's been such a big series character, but it ended pretty quickly for him. Good that it was Veradis that killed him though. Don't have much to say about the prophecy stuff other than to say I LOVE that it wasn't a real prophecy and that it all ended with just humans being evil as opposed to it being about gods. (Yes, Asroth was involved, but it was Nathairs choice to CONTINUE ON and all his choices actually that lead to that war. ) Anyway, those are my scattered thoughts. Thanks for reading :) Anj

[ontheline-ff]

1 | wyd?

Whoever invented buzzers was a fucking asshole.

For the last two minutes, a non-stop staticy buzz rang through the loft that housed Venus Carter. It reverberated off of the brick walls into one long buzzing sound that wasn’t helping anything right now. It sounds too much like an alarm in the dark, blackout curtain assisted bedroom, and it makes her head spin a little as the little lines of sunshine that fight to fill more than just slices on the floor put everything into perspective for just a second.

It’s morning now. Last night, from the jibberish staring back at her as notifications on her phone as she pulled it from underneath her pillow, she was definitely more drunk than she usually allowed herself to be. The inquiries from her followers lets her know that she was definitely on one last night. She’d love to open her phone and try to figure out what was going on, but she can’t.

Not yet, anyway.

The buzzing is the only reason she’s up, really.

“Ughhhh…. Fuck, okay, I’m coming.” Venus whined pitifully as she pulled her body up from her bed, and jabbed her fingertips into her eye sockets.

She pressed her fingers there for only a second, but it’s enough to see dots of color when she pulled back. Small feet with black and blue glittery toes stuffed into Nike slides and her hands reflexively snatched down a purple and black ombre robe as she walked the long walk to the front door, all while cursing the fact that this loft had floor to ceiling windows that wouldn’t dare allow her to miss out on the sunlight.

Usually, she wouldn’t complain, but right now, it just needed to be dark. The darker, the better, actually. She felt like shit. She felt horrible, and promised herself that she would never fucking drink liquor again.

It was eleven AM in Brooklyn, and Venus had a hangover. Like, a bad ass hangover, one that not even a Postmates delivery of Gatorade and Chinese that she was still drunk when she yelled for Alexa to arrange could help with. She still shuffled across the floor and sighed softly as she finally opened the door, and winced at the sight of the sunlight that was determined to break in through the front door.

The guy standing in front of the door pulled his finger away from the buzzer and stared at her.

“Here’s your hangover cure.” She was still wincing as the bag was thrust into her hands without much else being said.

She silently thanks him for his patience. There was a look of understanding that passed, and a nod from the driver as he walked back to the sidewalk. He looked like he knew her, or understood her struggle. Most likely both, from the way it lingered. She just shrugged it off and served him her back.

Venus cursed softly as she closed the door behind her, shutting out the bright sunlight, and going back into the inescapable brightness of her living room. She slumped down on her couch and groaned before opening her bag, and pulling out a carton of chicken fried rice and a bag of egg rolls.

The grease probably wasn’t going to help her general overall feel, really. She would try to convince herself that it would, though. After a few minutes in cherished silence, she was killing her carton of rice with the occasional chew of the still hot egg roll without a care in the world. Everything was going good until she realized she hadn’t touched her phone since she got up.

She still had to put two and two together, still needed to recount how the fuck she ended up so drunk to where she was suffering from a massive hangover. Her phone buzzed across the living room table as she stared at it, and caught it before it fell.

215-667-8890: Wyd?

Her nostrils flared in annoyance as she glimpsed at the message on the lock screen, which came from an unsaved number with a 215 area code. Who did she know from Philly?

Her tongue rolled around her lips as she pulled herself up to sit up straight, and pressed her lips together as she unlocked the phone. It wasn't unlikely for someone to text her out of the blue; she’d had the same number since she was thirteen years old. But, she couldn’t recall giving anyone from Philly her number, or giving her number out at all, really.

She tried to think - was it work related? An internet friend, maybe? Someone from Plenty Of Fish, even though she’d deleted that app months ago? Did Juju give her number out again to some nigga she didn’t want to talk to? Curiosity was getting the best of her as no person in particular seemed to jump out at her. She decided to text back anyway.

Just woke up. Fighting a Hangover. Who is this?

The phone hiccuped as the message was sent, and the bubble was blue, which made her eyebrows raise. If she didn’t get an answer within the next couple of texts, she was definitely going to accidentally facetime the number to see who answered.

Venus wet her lips as she leaned over to the side of the couch and grabbed the forgotten, room temperature bottle of Glacier Cherry Gatorade and drank from it as if she had been lost in the desert. She nearly choked when the phone pinged back with a response.

215-667-8890: Nobody told you to do a waterfall of Don Julio like you're a big dog, V.

Oh, so this person knew her name? That made her head tilt a little as she switched away from the Messages app, and went straight to Snapchat. She immediately opened up the snapchat thread between her and her cousin, her best friend, and sent several eye emojis before she started to snap.

Vdotcarter: Juanita, who in the fuck did you give my number to?

“Fuck did I do last night?” She questioned the empty room as she looked around and tried to get any reminder of how last night went.

It was just as clean as she recalled working hard to pull off, with no trash around the room, no mess littering the table, or even her clothes or shoes lingering in the doorway, where she’d usually strip as soon as she got in the house. Juanita’s message of “GO HARD, OR TAKE YOUR ASS HOME!” from like three weekends ago was still up there on her dry erase board, and there hadn’t been any new pictures pinned up to the corkboard square of memories that stuck out to her either, so what the fuck did she do last night?

Her honey brown eyes scanned the room again as she wedged her tongue in her cheek, almost annoyed by her lack of memories. It had been that way after drinking since that night in Vegas, but, it never took this long to flood back into her head. If Juanita knew what had gone down, she definitely wasn’t fuckin’ helping, not telling her what was up.

She scanned the room again, past title momementos, old UFC promotions, newspaper clippings, and still, there was nothing that jumped out to her. She might have gotten drunk, but as she looked down at her fingers and hands, she knew she didn’t beat anyone’s ass, so, maybe that was a good thing.

Everything seemed the same, really. It didn’t smell any different, and there was nothing that really stuck out to her, until she took a look over at the ottoman she had arranged on the other side of the living room set up. There was a white, long sleeved thermal, with a little rip in the neck area. She tilted her head at it, and stood up, walking over to it. She picked it up and inhaled it, but knew it didn’t belong to her, yet smelled too familiar for her to admit as to who it did.

“Motherfucker…” She looked around, now looking for things that didn’t belong to her.

Masculine things. Little things. Like the sparring gloves hanging next to hers, bigger, red. Not her color. An extra water bottle, with an obnoxious, star spangled meshing around it. There was also a diamond link chain that hung almost ominously over one of the taller cat statues that rested over her TV that she knew didn’t belong to her.

“Fuck.” She sucked her teeth, not wanting it to be him, but knowing it was.

Now, it was just a matter of confirmation.

Her phone was still idle in her hand, and she tapped at the screen and glanced back down at her snapchat feed, and flicked through the stories. Instead of trying to tap on anything that stuck out to her, Venus opted back to her own story, and watched through slightly drawn eyes as she relived her entire night.

In the span of a few minutes, she saw herself going through the motions of locking up at the gym, or at least, the departure from her building to her car in the parking lot. There wasn’t much there, but she remembered the sparring session. She remembered kicking ass, and talking shit the entire time. She didn’t need that to be recorded to know that.

Then, she was driving, debating if she wanted to go out, ‘cause she hadn’t in a while, and then, she was home, pregaming with shots of tequila and doing lip-sync karaoke to songs from the early ‘00s. She was cursing out Juanita for not wanting to come out with her, and the rest of the snaps went like a quick, but familiar blur.

The phone buzzes again, and she doesn’t hesitate to switch screens to get back to her inbox.

215-667-8890: why didn’t you save my number?

Her response is immediate.

Because I don’t know who this is??

If she was being honest with herself, it was literally only two people. Maybe it was Tony, who came with Adonis when he made the move from Philly to Brooklyn. But, Adonis had been claimed, fucked her cousin on the regular before they broke up, and spent the majority of the time acting like he didn’t miss his shot, shooting for the wrong cousin. Tony was just there for the ride, interested in the girl who could fight, even determined enough to ensure that she still could after almost losing everything a year back.

Thinking emojis follow, and seconds later, a video pops up in response. She doesn’t hesitate to play it. Her eyebrows raised as she watched herself do exactly what she had been accused of earlier.

A large triangular bottle of Don Julio that she knew went for about $150 was being poured into her mouth with reckless abandon, and her eyes narrowed as she watched herself drink until she needed to pull away. After she threw her head back from the tequila stream, the phone shook with hoots and hollering, and the camera rotated to a smiling face, complete with bottom and top golds that made her curse softly.

She knew Adonis when she saw him, and she knew that this? Was no good.

“Oh Venus, you dumb bitch.” She cursed softly as she covered her mouth with her hands, tenting her hands as she groaned into them, but she couldn’t stifle the sound.

She went back to her snapstory with determination to figure something out. There was an appearance by Tony, who she sang loudly to, and took some shots with, and then later, Donnie was there, pipin’ it up for a second before slinging his arm around her, and pulling her into him. When the bottle of Don Julio was brought over by the bottle girl, V knew it went downhill after that shit.

Venus remembered some of this; she remembered getting dressed and leaving in an uber, heading to a club. She remembered saying, “fuck it,” and getting ready to go have some fun. After Donnie made that ignorant ass purchase though, shit got blurry after that. There was a lot of shots taken, captions that were incoherent, and a bunch of black screen requests, until they just stopped. She shook her head.

The phone hiccuped again. More video came from the unsaved number, this time, explicit at that. There was her hair wrapped around a fist, and her mouth was way too filled to do anything else than take what was being fed to her. She felt a familiar tug on her scalp and hissed. Shit.

Shit.

Donnie loved doing that shit, trying to get a rise out of her. He always had, since they first met, and he asked if it was real, ‘cause it was long, and stupid for her to have long hair, when all bitches knew how to do in a fight was go right for it. They flirted like that. For years.

But, all of that skirting around? It was a waste of time. She knew eventually they would stop bullshitting, but she wanted to fucking remember all of it. She sat her phone down and threw her head back against the couch cushions as she cursed again, in partial disbelief as to what she saw.

215-667-8890: We’re not going to fuck around with details just yet. It’ll come back to you.

215-667-8890: It might not jump right out to you, but, it will. Save my number, Venus.

She had no idea how she was going to explain how she slept with her cousin’s ex-boyfriend, but she knew she needed to figure something out. She flattened her body against the couch and cursed softly as the need for chinese and gatorade turned into a long desire to curl up, and sleep it off.

She saved the number with her tongue wedged in her cheek, and her eyes darting back across the room, trying to figure out all of the hows and whys, and if there was more video that didn’t make Snapchat...

Adonis: Since you’re acting like you don’t remember things, I promised you breakfast in the morning, and it’s not too late for french toast. Meet me at LB’s in twenty. Let’s talk about this.

[harrieatthemet]

Holiday: Ch. 11

A/N: There is a.... subtle hint or two in here..... if y’all pick up on it, please let me know.... because..... I have something VERY big planned for you guys...... don't think you're prepared....

They were all sprawled out on the couch, Penelope’s legs laying over Quinn’s torso as his head hung off the end of the sofa. Brayden had his feet poking Penelope’s side, jabbing his toe to get her to whine dramatically in agony. It’s what lured me in here, abandoning my laptop and a bedroom simulation in my kitchen. As I skulked in the doorway, watching the three of them bicker playfully, I had realized that it was nearing bedtime. And as if the time hadn’t told me it was time to get them to bed, it was Quinn’s abrupt tears that did. He had gone from giggling, swinging his head violently side to side off the end of the couch, to hysterical screaming and crying after Brayden had accidentally kneed him in the gut. I groaned in irritation, because I truly did not have it in me to do anything except lay down. The past couple of weeks I’d felt so icky, my stomach always hurting and bringing me right the verge of getting sick. I shuttered at the thought of having to drag Penelope up the stairs, much like I had to do every night, because if I’d move too fast I’d get dizzy. 

The hissy fit was a domino effect, as Quinn’s tear fest triggered Penelope’s whining. And Brayden, he just could never tolerate his siblings during their meltdowns. He always perceived himself as very mature, and would belittle Penelope and Quinn when they’d cry. He had already started, rolling his eyes and giving Penelope a little shove before lecturing the little two on how ‘crying is for babies’. This did nothing for Penelope, and in fact, even made it worse. It was the typical song that played in my house, Brayden calling Penelope a baby and Penelope screaming that she wasn’t one.

“Okay, okay,” I hummed, entering the room, “think it’s time to get ready for bed.”

“Ughhhh noooooo.” Penelope bellowed, throwing her head back dramatically as her tears came down harder.

I didn’t want to laugh, because Penelope was a little sensitive and I knew it would hurt her feelings if she caught me laughing at her mid-meltdown. I don’t know where she got the dramatics from, but I always assumed it was a little of Harry’s doing. I’d never really seen myself as a drama queen, though I’m sure if you asked Harry he’d beg to differ. But I think a lot of Penelope’s theatrics was the end result of Harry spoiling her rotten. After Brayden, he had been itching to have a girl. But, oh boy, once she got here everything changed. Brayden would always hold a special place in Harry’s heart, being that he was such a sweet surprise and because he was the first. And of course Quinn was special, being that he was he baby of the bunch and loved to keep Harry and I on our toes. But Penelope made Harry melt. He did not have a favorite child, he’d express that to me and to anyone else who asked a million times over, but him and Penelope had a special little bond. Everything she did left him in awe, and he praised her for even doing simple tasks. He loved dressing her up, doing her hair, playing dolls and having very serious tea parties, where he’d be required to dress up. There was nothing she asked for from him that he’d never give her, because he absolutely lived to see the look on her face when she’d get something she wanted. But it was turning her into a little bit of a brat. 

And as if rallying everyone up to just get them up the stairs, at the very least, the sound of the doorbell bellowing throughout the house made it even worse. Brayden practically threw his body off the couch, subbing his toe on the love seat by the door as he went sprinting full speed out of the room. Quinn pulled himself together, his meltdown disappearing altogether as he followed Brayden. Penelope, reluctant and still hysterical crying, shuffled slowly out of the room towards the front door. It didn’t matter if she was mid fit, seeing who would be ringing the bell at almost 9 at night still took priority. 

Brayden fumbled with the lock, getting it wrong two or three times before he could finally get it right. Quinn was jumping up and down, grabbing onto Brayden’s shirt and trying to propel himself off the floor so he could get a look at the visitor. Penelope hung back a little, sniffling as she calmed herself down. It was then I started to laugh, because even if she was being super dramatic to get attention, she still had to be a part of the action. 

“Dad!” Brayden geeked, throwing himself at Harry.

“Yeh not in bed!” He chuckled, taking a step into the house before peppering Brayden’s face with some kisses.

He moved onto Quinn next, who smiled contently as Harry placed a little kiss amongst the bridge of his nose. Quinn, being the witty bugger he is, went and licked a stripe right across Harry’s cheek. And while normal people would bellow a chorus of ‘ewwww’ s, Harry laughed softly before scrunching his nose. Penelope stood off in the corner, shyly of course, playing it innocent as if she didn’t just through a big fuss 5 minutes ago. Her face was flushed from crying, eyes red and cheeks tear-stained. His lips coiled into a little frown, gaze falling upon her as she stared at the floor. This was a signature move of hers, acting shy and reserved for a little sympathy. She was truly her father’s daughter.

“Hope yeh not crying cos it’s bedtime, petal.” Harry murmured, familiar with her charade as he waltzed over to her before picking her up and sitting her on his hip.

“Not tired.” She pouted, Harry’s finger brushing a piece of hair from her eyes.

“If yeh not tired,” he sung, moving her hand so she wouldn’t suck her thumb, “can’t sing yeh t’sleep.” 

Penelope’s eyes went wide, being that she assumed now that Harry was here he’d put her to bed instead of me. She wiggled in protest as she sat preciously in Harry’s arms, causing Harry to smile a little before putting her down. The tears, on all ends, had subsided. Though I hadn’t spoken to Harry much the past couple of days, I was glad he’d popped in even if it was sudden and unannounced. He had been away for the past two weeks, doing some promo in London. So I was sure his arrival just before bedtime had been a nice surprise for the kids, and an even better one for me seeing that I didn’t have to deal with the bedtime dramatics. And even though I was glad he was here, and the kids got to see him even if it was only just before bed, I was still a little uneasy about our night out at dinner. 

The past two weeks, I had really tried my hardest to push the entire incident out of my head completely. But the more I tried, the more difficult it was. It felt like every time I’d thought I was through thinking of it, it would trickle back into my thought process before dominating it altogether. I hadn’t had the balls to ask him who she was, how he knew ‘Izzy’ and why she was a little overly excited to run into him. I wanted to ask what the relationship was, if it was a dating thing or just a hook up, but I grappled with whether or not it was any of my business. What he did, while we were off doing our own things, was entirely his business. But that definitely didn’t keep me from being curious. It made me wonder how many “Izzies’ there really were, how many people he’d slept with or dated in the duration of the past year.

“Get on up there,” he encouraged, shooing all three kids up the steps, “ ‘nd I’ll come t’tuck each of yeh in.”

I watched as Brayden leaded the way, Penelope hot on his heal as Quinn trudged along behind them. It was just Harry and I now, standing together in the foyer in a slightly uncomfortable silence accompanied by an undeniable tension. I hadn’t made much of an effort to call, or text really, the two weeks he was gone. He’d call two or three times a day, itching to talk to the kids and see how my day was. I’d always meet him with an excuse, kids were at school or I was expecting a work related call. When he’d text, I’d reply with half assed answers, and I’d often forget to answer until a few hours later. He knew something was up, my emotions were always on show via the expressions of my face. I hated that, though it always seemed to work in Harry’s favor. 

“Missed yeh.” He murmured, taking a step closer towards me.

“Was only a couple of days since I last saw you.” I shrugged, my fingers tugging at the sleeve of my sweater.

“Two weeks, since our date. Tha’s long,” he added, slithering an arm around my waist before roping me into his chest, “especially since y’fuckin suck at answering th’phone.”

“I don’t” I defended, “just working.”

“Been all weird since dinner , somethin’ wrong?” His voice was low, his lips ducking towards my neck just before nipping at my sweet spot.

“No,” I lied shamelessly, “nothing. Been stressed out with work, s’all.” 

“I’ll put th’kids t’bed now,” he stated, voice low and lustful, “ ‘nd all take care o’ yeh after, yeah? Sound good?” 

I had a decision to make there, as the words rolled off his tongue. I could agree, which I so desperately wanted to. And if I agreed, to me it meant having to officially let the entire Izzy fiasco go and move on from it. Or I could bring it up, now, as his lips sucked little hickeys around my collarbone before he’d let his tongue run over it gently. I could bring it up and just ask, sweetly and in a non confrontational way. Though it never really worked out like that, and I was sure if I did end up asking, he’d either dismiss the conversation entirely or it’d result in an argument. Maybe both. No, definitely both.

“Ok,” I breathed out hastily, “yeah.” 

“Dadddddy.” Penelope whined from the top of the steps, pink nightgown on as tears made her eyes glassy.

Harry laughed softly, his breathy chuckle lapsing against the crook of my neck. He dragged his lips up to my cheek, pressing a quick kiss to it. Before prancing up the stairs, two steps at a time like he always did, he shot me a cheeky wink. I smiled in response, hands hidden away in the sleeves of my baggy white sweater. Penelope waited for him at the top of the stairs, quite impatiently, as one hand clutched onto her bunny Lovey while her other hand found it’s thumb in her mouth. I shook my head, because I’d been trying desperately to get her to stop sucking her thumb. 

After sweeping Penelope up, bringing her to her room, I lagged up the stairs and headed off to my room. I could hear the soft murmur of Harry’s voice, singing her one of her favorite lullabies. I poked my head into Quinn’s room on my way down the hall, relieved to see him passed out while nestled into the sheets of his crib. And after that, I peered into Brayden’s room through the crack of his door. I had assumed Harry had left the lights on after tucking him in, since Brayden was out cold. 

Traipsing into my room, I let out a long gust of breath as I closed the door behind me. I knew Harry would be in here not too long after me, ridding himself of most of his clothes before encouraging me to do the same. I was truly curious as to why he was being so nonchalant about the entire Izzy thing, and how he had been so quick to just casually dismiss it. If it were the other way around, the conversation would’ve already been had, and he wouldn’t have held himself back from prying and asking a million questions. 

It wasn’t until I slid on a pair of shorts, sandwiching myself between my sheets and my mattress, that I could hear him fumbling with the door knob. He came in a huff, letting out a guttural groan after putting Penelope to sleep (which, believe me, is as hard as fucking rocket science). I could hear him kick his shoes off, the sound of his ratty old sneakers thumping against the wood of the floorboards as they landed in the corner near the door. His shirt was next, the thin fabric of his tee shirt settling on my bedroom dresser. The bed moved a little as he flung himself on it, his chest colliding with the soft fabric of the duvet while his face planted right into the pillow beside mine. I had my back to him, resting on my side, as he wrestled around to get into a comfortable laying position. His next move was no surprise, his hand climbing over my torso and resting on my belly as he scooted himself in closer to me. The front of his body molded with back of mine, his chin sweetly resting on my shoulder. I shifted a bit, my stomach feeling uneasy as I moved my weight a little. 

“Y’alright, button?” He cooed, hand moving from my belly to arm before adoringly rubbing it.

“Just,” I choked out, my stomach hurting even more, “don’t feel well.”

“Want me t’make yeh a cuppa?” He hummed, his hand trailing up my side and towards my chest.

“Careful,” I seethed, jerking forward as his hand accidentally grazed over my sore nipples, “don’t need tea, think I’d probably throw up anything I put in my stomach anyways.”

“Try getting some sleep, probably caught th’bug Brayden had.” He assumed, hand going back to tracing my spine. 

I gladly obliged, nestling myself deeper into the sheets before adjusting my pillow until I was comfortable enough. My bed had never felt this good before, and after my busy day I was more than thankful to be laid up. But it was absolutely impossible trying to get to sleep, being that every which way I tried to lay only made my stomach hurt more. All the cramping, and the unsettling sensation of queasiness, was keeping me up. I could feel the dragging of Harry’s fingers up and down my back start to die down, letting me know he was drifting off into sleep. It felt like a million hours later, but I finally did get to dose off.

And of course, I was abruptly lulled out of sleep by the sound of a phone. My eyes peeled open, as I let out an annoyed and sleepy groan. Out of all the times Harry’s phone goes off, right now had to have been the most inconvenient. Through squinted eyes, trying my best to see in the dark, I tried to look at the clock to get an idea of what time it was. And once I realized it was only 4 in the morning, I grew even more annoyed.

“Turn the damn ringer off next time.” I growled, nudging Harry with my arm to get him up.

“Wha’?” His voice was low, muffled by the pillow as he was half awake.

“Your goddamn phone,” I sneered, “turn it off.”

“S’not mine.” He answered, rolling over before falling back asleep again.

I rolled my eyes, forcing myself to wake up completely before sitting myself up. It was like everything rushed to my head, just in that one simple motion, and I could feel my stomach doing literal somersaults. My hand stretched out towards the lamp on my bedside table, giving it a rough tug to get it to turn on. Flipping my phone over, I squinted my eyes to see who’d be calling me so early in the morning. Then, I got nervous. 6 missed calls from my sister, Molly, were all lined up as notifications on my lock screen. Molly was a little troublesome, and before she went away to college at Ole Miss, she’d always gotten into her fair share of trouble. She didn’t call me much while she away at school, which is why the sudden call bombing made my chest feel empty and my heart beat pick up. And as I went to dial her back, she rang again. 

“Molly,” I sighed, swiping to accept the call “have any idea what time it is here?” 

“Yeah,” her voice was strained, barely above a whisper, “m’sorry Ell, but I needed to get a hold of you. Tried calling the house, called Harry too but-“

“What’s wrong? Are you okay, where are you?” My voice went up an octave higher, fully awake now as I got a little nervous.

“I’m okay. I’m home, I mean- well I came home for spring break. So I’m in the city, yeah, I’m home.”

“Alright,” I breathed in relief, “so what’s wrong? Why are you still out? It’s early over there.”

“Ella it’s mommy.” She whimpered, voice wavering slightly. 

“What,” I could feel my chest tighten, the bed shifting as Harry sat up, “she’s okay, right? 

“She’s sick, really really sick. Apparently she has been, for a while I guess. Didn’t tell anyone. I’m at Sinai with her and daddy but-” I could hear her voice crack, my chest hallowing completely as my heart fell to my stomach, “I got here yesterday and she couldn’t get out of bed, and this morning she just- Ella she just literally collapsed, and we took her to the emergency room and-”

“Ok, Molly,” I huffed, my fingers fidgeting nervously, “what’s going on? Can you get to the point, you’re really just making me nervous.”

“Cancer.” 

And a word has never made me feel so small before. The very second her voice quivered, echoing in my ear through the receiver of the phone, I could literally feel my hands about to give out before the breath got sucked out of me. I felt helpless, sitting here in bed with a frantic Harry perched just behind me. His face fell too, hearing the word come from the phone as he sat particularly close behind me. I didn’t know what to do, what to say. I could just picture Molly right now, sitting just outside the hospital room. I’m sure she was slumped up against the wall, knees pulled into her chest as she pressed the phone to her ear. She was probably fussing with her hair, fiddling with the ends of her dark brown hair or anxiously chewing at it to keep herself from crying. I figured that’s why her voice was low and muffled, probably trying to keep my parents from hearing her. It was obvious that Molly was waiting for me to say something, waiting for me to reassure her and tell her everything’ll work out, like I’ve been doing since we were kids. But I didn’t know enough. Here I was, all the way across the country, with no knowledge on what was going on where I was clearly needed the most. 

“Ok,” I croaked, “okay, it’s fine. You’re fine. I’ll- fuck, okay. I’ll fly out today, I guess. Just, can you keep it together? At least till I get there?” 

I heard her choke out an agreement, ending the phone call not long after. After turning my phone off, I slid it back onto the dresser before swinging my legs off the side of the bed. My hair fell into my face, my hands gripping at the sheets as I tried to settle my body down. I could feel my stomach gurgling, making weird noises as the nausea came back in waves. I had to blink a couple times, just to make sure this was actually happening.

“Y’alright? Need me t’do something?” Harry asked softly, hand settling over mine before giving it a light squeeze. 

“Think,” I spoke shakily, “think I’m gonna-”

I wasn’t even halfway through the sentence before nausea became me. I was on my feet in seconds, hand flying over my mouth as I hurried across the room to get to the bathroom. The tile was against my knees, a cold sensation sending a few chills down my back as my head hung lazily over the toilet. I was holding my hair back, that is, until Harry came in and held it for me. White spots sort of blinded my vision as I got done getting sick, resting my bum on the back of my heels as I caught my breath. He crouched down next to me, boxer briefs stretching out a little on his thighs as he handed me a small cup of water.

“I can keep th’kids this week, if yeh need me to.” He spoke reassuringly, arching his head so he could look me in the eyes.

“Thank you, yeah.” I whispered, tugging at the hairband on my wrist before throwing my hair up in a bun.

I didn’t stay in their long, hurrying back into the bedroom to search for a duffle bag. Harry sat on the edge of my bed, a little groggy and sleep deprived as his eyes followed me around the room. I was bouncing back and forth, getting a bit of a head rush here and there from moving so fast, as I grabbed onto really the first article of clothing I’d find. And as I stuffed random shirts into my bag, I had realized I hadn’t even packed a single pair of pants.

“Can all go t’New York, might be good for ‘em to see yeh mum.” Harry cajoled, shifting his position on the bed.

“No,” I grunted, fumbling with the knob of my knickers drawer, “just, can you keep them here? They have school and stuff. My mom’ll be fine, it’s fine.” 

“Yeh sure? Really don’t mind at all.” He persisted, driving me up a wall.

“Yes,” I hissed agitatedly, “told you already, she’ll be fine. Can you just keep everything together here while I’m gone? Behave and all that?”

“Talkin’ t’me like I haven’t done it a million times before.”

“Just wanna make sure I can trust you, that’s all.” 

“Wha’s tha’ supposed t’mean?” His voice was a little offended, annoyance laced in as well.

“You tell me.” 

“Ella,” he groaned, hands rubbing his eyes to wake himself up a bit more, “can yeh not do this right now. Got bigger things t’deal with.”

“It’s just, I don’t know. What, like, what do you get into when you’re on your own? Izzy? Get into her when I’m not around?” I hadn’t even tried to bring the conversation here, yet somehow I managed to.

“Been waiting for yeh t’bring tha’ up again.” He groaned, “Told yeh it was nothing. Just, can yeah just move on it from it, already.”

“Typical of you to be dismissive about it.” I laughed dryly, zipping up my bag. 

“Typical of yeh t’expect the worst from me!” He spat back.

“Can’t really blame me, can you?” I exhaled, sliding on the sneakers I had laying out by my closet. 

I could hear him breathing loudly, blatantly annoyed at how bitchy I was being. I’m sure he figured it was just because of how stressed I was, and how I was about fly home into a big fucking disaster. I was glad I had said something, though, because it had been eating away at me for over two weeks. I didn’t even give him the chance to meet me with a response, as I was already halfway down the stairs with my bag in hand. I didn’t wanna hear what he had to say, because right now it didn’t really make a difference to me.

[scphialillis]

byeler prompt- all the boys are at mike’s for a sleepover and dustin and lucas are suspecting that will and mike have crushes on each other and they over analyze every move they make. do whatever you’re inspired to do to make that into an actual story with an ending

ok. 1) i really liked this prompt and i wish i could have done it the justice it deserves, but instead i got this, ughhhh. 2) i’m sorry it took so long at that it sucks, but something came up and i’m pretty stressed!! so i hope u enjoyed this at least a lil bit :)

words: 1986

warnings: none, i think? swearing i guess. 

characters are 16!

Lucas and Dustin usually hummed theme songs from cartoons and quizzed each other on movie (or video game) knowledge when they were on their way to Mike’s place to keep things from getting too quiet, but today they didn’t. Today an odd silence fell between the two boys, the only sounds coming from Dustin’s bike chain and their shoes scraping against the road. Dustin pushed his bike and walked next to Lucas, since Lucas had a flat tire. At first he offered to give Lucas a ride on his bike, but it didn’t really work out, so they just walked.

Dustin’s mind was focused on one particular topic that afternoon, and he’d finally had enough of keeping it in.

“Lucas?” He asked, kicking a small pebble from in front of his foot.

“Yeah?”

“I think… I think Will likes Mike. And that Mike likes Will.”

“What?” Lucas stopped, and put his arm out to stop Dustin too. Dustin did so, and looked at him. “Where did that idea even come from?”

Dustin moved Lucas’ arm and started walking again, Lucas following.

“You don’t see it? Of all people, Will is the only one Mike never gets frustrated with, the only one he’s never shouted at, ever-”

“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean he has a crush, Dustin,”

“Uh, I’m not finished.” Dustin scoffed, Lucas rolling his eyes in return. “As I was saying. Mike has never yelled at Will, he never gets mad at him.. and he’s really, especially, uh gentle? And nice with him, you know.. I don’t know how to explain it..” But to be fair, he didn’t think he would have to. Lucas spends just as much time with Mike, he should’ve been able to tell as well.

“He’s got heart eyes for Will, real bad. The way he looks at Will.. that’s not the way I look at you. Or how Mike looks at me, or how you look at El. You’re telling me you’ve never noticed it? Not to mention, they’ve been spending a lot of time together, alone. More than usual. Making random excuses to have places to be? Sometime I think they forget we go to the same school, and I know damn well they don’t have that many projects. And when we are with them, it’s like they’re off in their own world.”

“But.. Mike’s not gay. He likes girls, he’s had lots of crushes on them. He literally kissed El and went to the snowball with her.” Lucas said.

“You’re right,” Dustin shrugged. “But have you ever heard of the term bisexual?” Lucas shook his head. “Steve told me about it, his roommate in college is bisexual—bi for short. It’s where you like boys and girls.”

“You can like boys and girls?” Lucas was definitely intrigued now. “Like, for real?”

“Totally,” Dustin nodded. “I think Mike is.. and I really think he likes Will.”

“But what about Will?” Lucas asked, but he knew the answer. Will never had a crush on a girl (or at least never told the party), he never even talked about the girls in movies like Lucas and Dustin did sometimes. Lucas supposed that maybe that had been the reason boys at school called Will homophobic slurs and not the other boys. Had it been obvious? If so, what about Will made people think he was gay? Lucas never even thought about it until now.

“I don’t know.. he’s not really into girls. He doesn’t even talk about them.. like, ever,” Dustin shrugged. “But I think he likes Mike. I think he’s liked Mike for a while.” Dustin was the one to stop now. And Lucas did the same. “He trusts Mike the most, obviously. And he’s closest to Mike… How haven’t you noticed yet? The way he smiles at Mike is all “Mike! Mike, I love you! Marry me, Mike!”. You know? And Mike looks at him all like, “Will are you okay? Is there something wrong? I’ll hurt whoever hurt you, Will! I’ll risk it all for you, Will!” Yeah?“

It didn’t take much convincing to get Lucas’ mind twirling around the topic.

He thought about it for a minute. He thought about how Will only ever called out for Mike when he was having episodes, how Mike got to see Will’s drawings before anyone. How Mike was the only one who had a sleeping bag just for him at Will’s house, tucked neatly under his bed. How when Will got scared or was in trouble, Mike was the first one there. Holding Will in his arms, telling him it was okay, that they were okay. How Will would stare at Mike for no reason. How they would brush hands occasionally and let them linger for much longer than Dustin and his own hands ever did. And now he was thinking about the heart eyes, like Dustin had mentioned previously. And it made sense. Mike looked at Will the same way he looked at El, if not with something…more.

"Shit,” Lucas mumbled under his breath. “I think you could be right.”

Dustin grinned and nodded, “Hell yeah, I am.” The boys started walking again.

“So, what are we gonna do? Should we say something?” Dustin asked.

“Absolutely not, are you crazy? We don’t even know for sure…” They were now approaching the Wheeler house, and lowered their voices.

“Then we do some investigating,” Dustin said.

Lucas only nodded, and Dustin dropped his bike on the lawn before the two entered the house.

“Hi, Mrs. Wheeler,” Lucas said as they passed her in the kitchen.

“Hi, boys! Mike and Will are-”

“Downstairs, got it,” Dustin finished and they went down to the basement. When they arrived, Mike and Will were sitting on their knees looking through movies silently. Dustin nudged Lucas with his elbow eagerly and nodded his head at the other two boys.

“Yeah, I see it,” Lucas rolled his eyes and Will turned his head at the voice, before waving.

“Hey,”

Dustin stood up straight, “Hey. What’s up?” Lucas sighed at his weird behavior and sat on the couch, Dustin followed him.

“What about the shining?” Mike asked, looking at Will. Dustin looked at Lucas expectantly and Lucas raised his eyebrows as if saying “I see.”

“Yeah, sounds good.” Will said. He put the other movies back on the shelf while Mike put the VHS in. Mike grabbed four cans of soda and a bag of chips from the table where the played D&D before passing them around to the other boys. Will and Mike would be sleeping on a pallet made of blankets on the floor; Dustin and Lucas taking the couch like usual. It wasn’t the most comfortable, but it was tradition.

When Mike and Will sat on the floor, Dustin and Lucas watched the two of them, trying to see how they’d position themselves. Mike grabbed a pillow and put it against the couch, pressing his back against it. Will laid flat on the ground, propping his head on a pillow. Probably not the best idea, because he couldn’t see very well.

“Can you see, Will?” Mike asked softly. Lucas and Dustin leaned in to hear them better.

“Not really, I should sit up-”

“No, look,” Mike placed a pillow on his lap, “here. It’s the perfect height and you can still lay down.” He smiled gently and Will’s cheeks turned a light shade of pink as he rested his head in Mike’s lap.

Dustin started slapping Lucas’ arm in excitement, and Lucas smacked his hands away.

The boys made eye contact and Lucas mouthed, “Will is blushing,”

“He’s rushing? No he’s not-” Dustin whispered.

“I said blushing, you dumbass.”

At first Mike didn’t know where to put his hands but at some point one ended up near Will’s head, his fingers gently twisting the ends. Lucas did this with Max. Was Mike doing that on accident? Maybe. But he didn’t accidentally offer to let Will rest his head on his lap, that was for sure.

Dustin and Lucas started analyzing everything the other did even closer now. When something scary would happen in the movie, Will would flinch and Mike would use his free hand to rub his arm or chest soothingly. Once Mike grabbed his hand and Dustin almost pissed himself.

Lucas wondered if Mike and Will had always been like this, in a friendly way, and if he and Dustin were just looking too deep into it. That idea went out the window when he saw Mike looking down at Will, a small smile on his face and his eyes holding the softest look Lucas had ever seen. Yeah, maybe that have always been like this, but not in a friend way. It’s the heart eyes, Lucas thought. Dustin was right.

When the movie ended, neither Mike or Will moved for a bit because Will was almost asleep. Dustin got up to turn the light on, but Mike stopped him. “No. Will’s asleep.. or he’s about to be. Leave it off.”

Will sat up and Mike grabbed the pillow from his lap, laying it on the ground where Will’s head would be, before laying his own pillow down and getting comfortable. He pulled the blanket up over him and tossed it over Will, before mumbling a quick goodnight to everyone. “Night, Mike,” the other three said in unison. Lucas and Dustin stayed up a little later, trying to see if Mike or Will did anything else. When Mike faced Will in his sleep, Dustin slapped Lucas’ awake, and they watched Mike’s hands barely reach out, one lazily landing on Will’s forearm and latching on to it.

That was the last thing they noted before knocking out.

Lucas woke up before anyone, and his eyes practically fell out his head at the sight on the floor in front of him. Will had his head resting on Mike’s shoulder, arms across his chest, and their legs were barely tangled together. Mike’s arms were wrapped around Will protectively. Lucas shook Dustin awake and they stood infront of the two boys, Dustin having a smug grin on his face.

“I told you, they’re totally into each other,” Dustin said. “I can’t believe this. I hate to admit this, but you’re right. Look at Mike, holding onto Will like he’ll lose him.. he’s got it bad.”

Dustin’s grin only grew and they walked upstairs for breakfast.

Will opened his eyes. Their voices woke him up; he was a light sleeper. He tried to wiggle out of Mike’s arms, but he only got pulled in closer. Mike was awake now, but he didn’t open his eyes. “No…” Mike mumbled. “Good morning,” Will said and got no response. “Mike? You awake?” “I wanna sleep longer…” “Just stay up for a second, alright? I need you to or else I’ll leave-” Mike squeezed Will harder and tightened his grip. Will smiled.

“I’m up.. just don’t go yet.”“Lucas and Dustin know.” “Know what?” Mike asked, voice slightly muffled because he tucked his face into Will’s neck.

“They know about us. Well, kind of. I think they had a bet over if we liked each other or not, I heard them talking about it just now.”

“Well they’ll really lose their shit when I tell them you’re my boyfriend, won’t they?” Mike hummed absentmindedly.

“Boyfriend?” Mike froze, eyes shooting open, his hands that had been gently tracing random shapes on Will’s skin had now stopped. Will pulled away to look at him, raising his eyebrows. “Who said I was your boyfriend?” Will teased, doing his very best not to smile.

Mike saw the humor in Will’s eyes and his stomach dipped in relief. He smiled a bit before pressing his lips against Will’s gently and quickly, because he knew Will wasn’t into morning breath kisses and honestly he wasn’t either. He tucked his head back into Will’s neck, his eyes fluttering shut. “I did.”

so like i said. i didn’t do this prompt justice. sigh. i’m sorryyy :( it deserves better

[drabbles-and-shit]

The Mailman is Really Attractive and Dean is Smitten

When Dean first saw the new mailman that Saturday afternoon, his body had such an immediate and visceral reaction, he had to excuse himself to his bedroom for a little quality time with his right hand.

Seriously, it was insane; nothing like that had ever happened to Dean. He only figured out that he was attracted to both guys and guys about a year ago, but he’d never even had that sort of response to a girl. And what’s worse? It was one of the best experiences he’s ever had jacking off.

Like, no shit, that mailman was the hottest human Dean ever laid eyes on, and he wasn’t even Dean’s type! Dean had always gone for the petite guys, because you know, he was a dom. Well, with guys he was. He had actually started experimenting letting girls top him, and much to his own embarrassment, he actually really liked it. There was something about someone else being in control that was hot as fuck. But, just girls. He wanted nothing in his asshole, ever, thank you very much. But anyway, even though he only ever had pursued twink-types, the mailman was buff as fuck. He had looked like he was about Dean’s height, and the summer heat-induced sweat made for a uniform that clung to his body just so Dean could see rippling muscle underneath. And the shorts, no matter how silly looking for being as short as they were, let Dean see the legs of either a runner who swims in his spare time or just the legs of an actual Adonis. And his forearms! God, so strong and tanned and--Dean noticed he was developing another situation down south and forced himself to concentrate on gross things like old people making out or his brother Sam’s face. Good, good; the situation went back down.

~***~

An uneventful week later, and Dean was back looking out his front window, shamelessly watching and waiting for the new mailman. He had no idea if he was actually going to come around again; hell, he might have just been filling in that one day for the old guy that Dean normally saw bringing the mail.

But Dean’s curiosity was rewarded, because after about ten minutes of casual spying, he noticed the mailman walking up the sidewalk with his messenger bag over one shoulder, radiating sexual appeal. God, he was just as hot as last week.

Oh my god, wait, he walked by the mailbox and towards the door. He was coming to the door. He probably had a package or something. But not the porno kind. Shit, what if he saw Dean last week? Dean jumped behind his couch as fast as humanly possible and tried to not breathe, because nobody was home. No one. Was. Home.

The doorbell rang, and Dean sucked his breath in and froze. Shit, the TV was on. He had completely forgotten it, and now the sexy mailman was going to know he was hiding like a kid afraid of Jehovah’s Witnesses, and he was going to judge him ughhhh. Suffice to say, Dean was fucking embarrassed.

He waited a solid five minutes before sneaking back to the window and checking the mailman was gone before opening his front door and grabbing the package off the step. His embarrassment was forgotten quickly, because it was his Star Trek phaser from ThinkGeek! Charlie was going to be sooooo jealous, and he couldn’t fucking wait to gloat. He snapped a picture of it and shot it off to her.

Dean: Looks like I win the gayness contest, because I can set phasers to STUN #2fab4u

Charlie: Oh my god, it came!!

Charlie: You had better bring that to work Monday so I can play with it

Dean: Only if you promise to not break it

Charlie: Btw did you see the hottie today??

Dean: Duh where did you think the package came from?

Charlie: DID YOU TALK TO HIM?!?!

Dean: You kidding? No way, Jose

Charlie: Ugh you’re no fun

Charlie: Wait. I have an idea! You should write him a letter and put it in your mailbox so he can read it when he brings your mail!!

Dean: Do you even know me? Charmando, I wouldn’t do something like that if my life depended on it

Charlie: You’re such a scaredy cat, Winchester

Dean: And proud

~***~

Drunk Dean sometimes did things that Sober Dean had to pay for, especially when his best friend/arch nemesis Charlie was involved. They always went for drinks together after work on Fridays, and somehow Dean always ended up being the only one of the two of them that did stupid, drunk person stuff. He was beginning to suspect that maybe she didn’t actually even drink, just pretended to so that she could talk his more malleable alter ego into doing what she wanted him to. Like, just a random example, writing a note to the sexy mailman.

He was going to kill her. Saturday morning met him with a skull splitting headache, and more importantly, oodles of regret. Because yes, he could vaguely remember sitting down with a pen and a piece of paper last night and writing… something. God, he couldn’t remember what the hell he had written. Maybe he had enough time to run out to the mailbox and take it out before it was too late!

Dean pulled on his sweatpants and charged out into the painfully bright midday sun. Despite his body’s many protests, he made it to the mailbox in record time, but it was for nothing, because when he opened it up, the note was gone and had been replaced by what looked like a bill and some coupons for pizza. He couldn’t really be sure, because his eyes felt like he was stabbing them full of needles. He defeatedly walked back into his house and pulled out his phone.

Dean: Dude. What happened last night. Tell me or I’m going to send your girlfriend your prom photos

He waited for a response while chewed discontentedly on a piece of cold bacon from the fridge and sipping a glass of water. He didn’t have to wait for long though, and he soon heard the telltale R2-D2 beep that was Charlie’s text alert noise.

Charlie: You were so plastered, my man. It was wild.

Charlie: I take it you only just woke up and didn’t have time to get the letter out of the box?

Dean: Shit, so that really happened? Dear god, tell me I didn’t write anything too embarrassing?

Charlie: You politely told him you wanted to suck his dick

Dean: I’ve got the picture ready to send!

Charlie: Ugh, fine. No, all you said was that you thought he looked nice and were wondering what happened to the old guy who used to bring your mail. Tbh it was pretty cute. I love drunk you

Dean sighed in relief. It was still as embarrassing as balls, but maybe the guy will think Dean has a kid or something and they wrote it. He can only hope at this point.

~***~

When Dean got home from work Monday evening and opened up the mailbox, his hopes that the mailman would just ignore the letter were proven useless.

Sitting there in the box, on top of a classic car magazine he subscribed to, was a small blue envelope with no stamp and just his first name in rather lovely script in the middle. He ripped it open before he even got inside, because holy fuck, there’s no one who would drive by his house just to put a letter in my mail other than Mr. Sexypants. It read:

Dear Dean,

I’m guessing by your handwriting and subject matter that you’re either a child or a drunk man. If it’s the former, please tell your parents that I am not a pedophile. Please. If you’re an adult and just have terrible handwriting, I’m sorry for touching on a sore subject.

Anyway, Cain, your previous mail carrier, was only working your route temporarily. He actually is one of the higher-ups for the USPS and was delivering mail as a sort of extended vacation from management. Odd, I know.

I appreciate that you think I look nice, and if you’re the adult male who lives at this address, I think you do too. If you’re a child, I’m sure you look nice, but in a non-pedophilic way.

Yours,

Castiel

Oh my god, Dean was in love. Haha, just kidding. He’s not in love; what are you talking about? Totally not in love. Nope, not at all. He lunged inside, pulled off his jacket and tie, and began furiously debating whether or not to tell Charlie about this. On the one hand, she’s his only real friend besides his younger brother, who is constantly busy with lawyer-things. But on the other hand, she would totally gloat about this for the rest of her life. But fuck it, he needs to talk to someone about this, because he never has romance in his life!

Dean: Omg you’ll never believe what happened\\

Charlie: Ooh! What??!

Dean: Mr. Double Stuffed Hotness is named Castiel, and I might want to marry him

Charlie: HE WROTE BACK?!?! It’s fate, my young grasshopper

Dean: I’m gonna send you a pic of the letter he wrote back so you can help me figure out what to write back

\

Charlie: You had better let me be your best man!! AND let me officiate!!! I’m already planning my speech

Dean: Don’t get ahead of yourself… but I’m actually kind of psyched rn

And so the planning began. Eventually, they decided on a note that read the following:

Dear Castiel,

As you deduced, I was drunk. Don’t worry, I’ll tell my parents you aren’t a pedophile anyway, just in case. Of course, they’re both in their 60s and will probably also assume I’m drunk, but better safe than sorry.

Thank you for saying I look nice, though I can’t imagine when you’ve seen me. I’m normally at work when you bring the mail (around 1:30pm, right?), so have you seen me on a Saturday? Okay, you don’t need to answer, just in case you’re actually a stalker or something. It’s never good to confront the bad guy in horror movies, and I’ve learned my lesson.

Hey, is your name really Castiel, or is that a pseudonym? I googled it, and it’s the name of the Angel of Thursday? What’s so special about Thursdays?

Live long and prosper,

Dean

~***~

Dear Dean,

I’m very glad I won’t be going to jail for calling a child attractive. You can probably hear my sigh of relief from there.

I can neither confirm nor deny when/where I have seen you. Also, are you calling me the antagonist of a horror film? If so, please enlighten me on which one, because I’m rather a fan of being scared shitless, and I’m sure seeing myself as the murderer will make an horror viewing experience even more terrifying.

And yes, my name is really Castiel. Let’s just say my parents were hippies. Many people call me Cas, though, and my siblings call me Cassie. I don’t like my siblings very much.

What about you? Why are you named Dean? Did your parents hope you would create a list of exceptional people? Or perhaps they wanted you to grown up to resemble Dean Martin?

I’m sorry, I don’t know where all that rude sass came from; it’s been a long day.

Khaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan,

Cas

~***~

Mr. Spock,

I had a girlfriend named Cassie once! Sort that information away for a future test, I suppose. How many siblings do you have? I one brother, and he can be such a bitch sometimes, so I definitely get where you’re coming from.

As it happens, I’m named after my grandmother, Deanna. And I swear to god, if you make fun of me for that, I will, um, do something… I don’t know exactly what yet, but I’ll figure it out, and it’ll be awful, I promise!

So, is it really that hard being a mailman? (You said it had been a rough day.) I’m a mechanic, by the way. If you ever need to know anything about cars, just hit me up, and I’ll be happy to help. For a price… Ha, just kidding. Maybe…

Dammit Cas, I’m a mechanic, not a doctor!

Dean

~***~

Bones,

I find it slightly perturbing that my nickname is also the name of your ex. But I always ace tests, so I guess I’m glad to know it anyway.

I have 5 siblings. I know. Hippies don’t believe in birth control, I guess. But yes, family of 8, from Michael the oldest, down to Sam the youngest. Since I’m on the subject, I suppose I might as well list off all my siblings. There’s Mike, Gabe, Luce, me, Anna, and Sam, ranging in ages from 37 to 21. Oh, I’m the ripe old age of 29, by the way. Not that that matters. Jesus, this entire letter is me talking about my family, sorry.

And no, it’s not hard being a mailman, but it is hard having to take your beloved cat to the veterinarian because they’re refusing to eat, not having bowel movements, and rolling around on the floor, meowing in pain. The poor guy had a blockage and almost died. It was a tough day.

I might just take you up on your offer to help explain things about cars, because I am completely clueless about them. I drive an old clunker that eats gas money like nobody’s business, and I really need to get a new car as soon as possible.

Have you been at the Romulan ale again??

Cas

~***~

Castiel,

I know I signed my last note with a Bones reference, but make no mistake, I am 100% Kirk, and I would appreciate it if you referred to me as such. Thank you for not forcing me to pursue legal action.

Dude, my younger brother is named Sam! Well, technically he’s named Samuel, after our grandfather, but still. Weird. And I’m 32, so that’s cool I guess.

I’m sorry to hear about your cat; that sounds pretty awful. I’ve never really had pets, and I’m actually allergic to cats, but I remember when Sammy’s dog was hit by a car and how distraught he was. I’m guessing your cat is all right now, though? If so, I’m glad. If not, sorry for rubbing salt in the wound.

Dude, do not drive that car. Like, stop it now. Please, for the sake of car lovers everywhere. Take it down to Singer’s Auto Salvage Yard; Bobby is a friend of mine, and if you tell him I sent you, he’ll give you a good price for it, and then you can use that money to buy something that’s not a piece of shit.

*funny Star Trek reference here*

Captain James Tiberius Kirk

~***~

Jim,

Can you sense me rolling my eyes? Because there’s some serious ocular oscillation going on right now in reference to your threats.

And I shortened my Sam’s name, too. His full name is Samandriel. Hippies, am I right?

Yes, my cat is fine, thank Talos. He is my best friend, and I don’t think I would be able to function properly if something happened to him. He’s a black shorthair named Toothless, by the way. Yes, I’m a basic bitch. Bite me.

I’ll try and take your advice about the car. I think my car is actually the automobile form of Sauron’s ring of power, because every time I’ve tried to get rid of it, it talks me into keeping it. I know in my heart that it needs to be torn apart for scraps, that it is taking advantage of me and should be destroyed before it does something terrible, but it’s mine. My own. My...precious…

Oh, my biggest problem is that if I sell her, I don’t know anything about buying cars, so I’m afraid someone will take advantage of my naivete and sell me an equally shitty car for a ridiculous price. Any suggestions?

*I can do this too*

Spock Spock Spock-ity Spock

~***~

Spockity,

God, I wish my parents had been hippies. Instead they were hippos. Yep, I was adopted by a pair of hippopotami at the age of four. Don’t believe me? Ask the Topeka Zoo, and they’ll corroborate my story. (Please don’t actually do that; they might remember me from when I was a teenager and broke in there to try and pet the giraffes.)

And I will never judge anyone for loving How To Train Your Dragon, because that movie was legendary. Toothless is the cutest dragon probably ever, and Hiccup is such a dreamboat.

Um, we definitely need to get rid of that car. Do not take me for some conjurer of cheap tricks! I’m trying to help you. And speaking of helping you, if you find a car and want to know just how swindled you’re going to be, just send me the information, and I can let you know if you should buy it or not!

So… what kind of music do you like? I’m a big classic rock fan, and if you aren’t I will become determined to change that about you.

Can we up switch references? Maybe Princess Bride or something?

Princess Buttercup

~***~

Buttercup,

I find your story inconceivable. But did you truly grow up in Kansas? Personally, I grew up in the wilds of Washington; Seattle, actually.

And good; I would be very upset with you if you didn’t love Toothless and Hiccup, though I must say Hiccup is not exactly my type. I like my men a little older than he (recall that I’m not a pedophile), and I think any man I may date should definitely be my size or larger, or else I might kill them accidentally in bed. Huh, I guess we haven’t really talked about sexuality ever, so sorry if that made you uncomfortable.

I would greatly appreciate it if you would actually send me your phone number or email or something, so I could send you the information on a car I’m seriously considering buying. If you’d rather not hand out such personal information, I completely understand though.

I confess I haven’t listened to much classic rock. I mostly listen to classical music, though I’ve been delving into the genre of lofi hiphop, and I actually really enjoy it.

As you wish,

Vizzini

~***~

Vizzini,

You keep using that word; I do not think it means what you think it means…

Yes, I grew up in Kansas, a little town called Lawrence to be precise. And the bit about breaking into the zoo was real too, so please don’t report me.

And honestly, I’m kind of in a weird experimental stage with my sexuality right now. I know, that’s supposed to happen during college, but maybe I’m just not a normal guy, all right? Anyway, I think I’ve officially decided I’m bisexual, but who knows? Romance is tiring, but sex is fun, and I don’t really mind who the hole belongs to. Jesus, that sounded awful and disgusting; sorry. I’m not even really like that any more. I haven’t had a hookup for like three months, which has got to be some kind of record. Sorry, this I should stop writing while I have the chance.

Totally send me the deets about the car, man. My number is 1-866-907-3235

Dude, I’m going to indoctrinate you. You fucking need to listen to classic rock; it’s the stuff of gods. Maybe I’ll make you a mixtape or something so you can listen to all the best songs. Weird question: do you have a tape player? I’m kind of old fashioned, so yeah, I’m going to make you a cassette tape with my favorite Zepp tracks on it.

Mahwage, dah bwessed awangment,

The Dread Pirate Roberts

~***~

For some reason, it was taking Cas a long time to get back to Dean. They had kind of worked out an unspoken schedule by this point; one of them put a letter in the box Monday, the other responded by Wednesday, and then the first sent back a response the Friday of the same week. Basically three letter a week for the past month or so. No, that’s not weird or creepy for two adult men to do at all.

Dean had dropped off that last letter on a Monday, but no reply came on Wednesday. He tried to not let it bother him, thinking Cas was probably busy or something. But then there wasn’t a reply Thursday or Friday either, and he started to get a little miffed. The least Cas could have done was to text him now that he had his number, but noooo. Unfortunately, Dean had to be out of town that Saturday, so no confrontation could happen over the 1:30 mail delivery.

The next Saturday rolled around with no word from Cas again, and Dean was starting to get legitimately worried. He would have understood if the guy took some time off maybe for being sick or something, but two weeks? Nobody takes two weeks off, especially without telling their… friend? Suddenly, Dean’s ridiculous number of insecurities started blaring at him. What if he and Cas weren’t friends? What if he didn’t actually mean anything to Cas at all? He probably was just another drain on Cas’ time, and Cas had finally decided he’d had enough and didn’t want to talk to Dean anymore. Hell, he might have requested a different route because Dean was harassing him. Shit, of course all this was too good to be true. Dean never made friends; Charlie was the only acception to that painful trend, and he had no idea why she still hung out with him.

Dean knew those thoughts too well; he knew his own self-loathing always came around and wouldn’t leave until he started thinking about other things. So, he thought about Cas. It was almost 1:30, two weeks since he’d heard from him last, and he decided to camp out at the mailbox and wait for whoever came. He had to know if Cas was all right, at least. The guy was his friend, even if maybe Cas didn’t see him as one.

He didn’t have long to wait before seeing his old mailman (Cain, was it?) peddling a sleek bicycle down the sidewalk with a messenger bag slung over his shoulder.

“Um, hey, sorry to bother you. Cain, is it?” Dean fidgeted, feeling awkward as fuck.

“Yes, that’s me. Can I help you with something?” Huh, okay, Cain seemed like a pretty chill guy. Maybe Dean could actually avoid a panic attack from doing something this wild.

“Uh, yeah. Do you know Castiel? He brought mail on this route for a while? I just haven’t seen him in a while, and I was worried that something happened.” Dean was talking too fast, but he couldn’t help it, okay?

“I know Castiel, and I know he took off a few weeks. Don’t know why though; maybe a vacation or something. I wouldn’t worry about it though, if I were you.”

Oh Dean was gonna worry about it, no doubt about that. Because wow, he was glad Cas was all right and not dead somewhere, but Jesus, what kind of douchebag friend goes on an extended vacation without so much as a goodbye?? So yeah, Dean was going to worry about what he did wrong and why he never could keep friends, and why he was such a fucked up excuse for a human being. Awesome.

~***~

Dean was depressed. Charlie tried cheering him up but to no avail. He was just depressed. He actually took the day off on Monday, because he was such a fucking sissy who couldn’t deal with anything. God, no wonder Cas didn’t care about him. No one should care about him; he was so pathetic.

The doorbell rang. Dean lifted his head from the pillow it had been buried in for the entire first half of the day and decided he probably ought to answer the door, seeing as there was a 98% chance it was Charlie with pie and beer and a chick flick to make him feel better. God, she was too good for him; he didn’t deserve such a good friend.

He pulled the door open and was greeted by the invisible man; wait no, there was a package and a pile of mail on the front step. He sighed and picked it all up, then promptly dropped it all on the floor, shut the door, and collapsed on the couch. He didn’t feel like looking at the mail. He didn’t feel like doing anything except for sleeping. Ugh.

But maybe that package would cheer him up. He rolled his eyes at the tiny optimistic voice in his head and then rolled right off the couch and crawled to the pile of mail. He grabbed package without so much as glancing over the letters, probably all bills, and violently tore it open. Ooh, it was those custom leather-bound journals he ordered off Etsy. One was embroidered with his Hogwarts House logo (Hufflepuff and proud!) and the other matched it but had Charlie’s House (Ravenclaw, more like Raven...dumb! Good one). One of the few things he was ashamed of about being a sissy was doing things like buying matching things for himself and his best friend, or having sleepovers with his best friend, or planning his future wedding with his best friend. ANYway.

Okay, cool, the opening the package plan had worked! Dean was feeling better already. But then he saw it. Underneath the topmost bill was a little blue envelope. Dean’s hand had never moved so fast (yes, never).

Sure enough, it was from Cas. But unlike all the other letters Dean had gotten from him, this one was stamped and had both mailing and return addresses on it. Without stopping to think about what the fuck that could possibly mean, Dean ripped open the letter and read:

Dear Dean,

I am so sorry I haven’t written you in so long. To put it succinctly, my father had a heart attack, and I had to go to to Washington to be with him. The past two weeks have been about family and rekindling our relationships with each other. My father passed away two nights ago, and the funeral was yesterday. I know we never really talk about serious things, but I hope you won’t mind if I tell you this.

Honestly, as heartbroken as I am to see my father pass, I’m grateful that it has brought my family back together. All of us were there with him at the end, all of us were gathered around his bedside as he breathed his last. And he went peacefully, so I’m also grateful for that. I’ll be staying up here for another few days before flying back, and then I’ll be back to work as normal. I put my address that I’m staying at while I’m in Seattle as the return address, but I’ll add my home address too at the bottom of the page; it only feels fair that since I know where you live, you should know where I do too.

Again, I’m sorry if I made you worry at all. I know you might not see me the same way, but you’ve actually become one of my closest friends over the past month. What that says about my personal life? That I’m very awkward and antisocial, that’s what it says.

I hope to talk to you soon,

Castiel

Thank the fucking lord. Dean let go of a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding and grabbed his phone.

Dean: Cas is okay!! His dad died but he’ll be back soon

Charlie: Wait, his dad died, but he’ll be back soon? Who is he, god? I mean, Jesus. Whatever, I’m not required to make good religious jokes

Dean: Haha, very funny

Charlie: But yay!! I’m so glad for you!! Maybe now you’ll stop sulking like a little lost puppy

Dean: I make no promises

~***~

As promised, Cas was back by the end of the week, and Dean couldn’t stop grinning when he looked out his window Saturday to see Cas walking up to his mailbox.

He pulled the door open and ran out, unprecedented behavior from the man afraid to make eye contact with girl scouts selling cookies outside the front of the grocery store.

“Cas! It’s good to see you, man!” He went in for a hug, but then it got a little too real, so it ended up being one of those awkward side-hugs that no one really likes but everyone has to deal with.

Cas smiled back widely, and Dean got a little lost in his eyes. Wow, he’d never actually seen Cas up close, and now that he did, he could tell that Cas was actually the most attractive man alive. His ocean blue eyes drew Dean in, and he found himself completely phasing out to the point that Cas had to repeat a question three times before he could respond.

“Sorry, um, what was that?” Was the response. Classic.

“I asked if you were all right; you look a little phased.” No shit, Sherlock.

“Uh yeah, I’m fine. Just a little tired.”

“I was a little worried I’d scared you off with my last letter, seeing as how you didn’t write back.” Shit, Dean had forgotten to.

“Fuck, I totally forgot that I had your address. I guess I’m not used to actually properly sending letters, not just putting them in the mailbox.” They shared a quiet laugh before Dean went on, somberly. “I’m really sorry about your dad. My mom passed a few years back, and I know how painful it is.”

Cas smiles sadly. “Yeah, it was rough, but like I said in the letter, it really brought my family together, and I’m sure dad would have been happy to see the impact he had on us.” He paused, and Dean could there was something more rolling around in his mind, so he decided to stay silent and let Cas finish his thought. “It’s funny, he was such an absent father when we were growing up. I know he was different when he and my mom were first married; I think he was a carpenter or something, and he was always at home with Mike and Luce when they were little. But then his business took off, and by the time I was in diapers, he was hardly ever around. Business trips, late nights working, early morning meetings, it never ended. It kind of tore our family apart, bit by bit. First, Gabe ran away when he was 16. He didn’t get in touch with any of us for almost a whole year. Later, he told me he just couldn’t stand to see all the arguing and pain in our family. Then it was Luce, angrily storming off to college and refusing to answer our calls or emails. He loved all of us, his siblings so much, and I think watching dad’s absence affect us younger kids really took a toll on him.”

Suddenly, Cas’ eyes flashed up, and his cheeks grew pink. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I’ve just been standing here, telling you my life’s story. And fuck, I’m on the clock; I really need to run.”

Before Cas could move, Dean grabbed his wrist. “Wait, can you give me your phone number? I put mine in my last letter to you, but I’m guessing you didn’t get that.”

They exchanged numbers as quickly as possible, and Cas ran off towards the next house on his route. Dean grinned as he watched his run away and immediately send him a trial-run text.

Dean: If you gave me a fake number, I’m going to go to your house and shave your cat

Off in the distance (only about 200 feet, to be perfectly honest), Cas stopped and looked down at his phone, and Dean could not hold back a huge laugh.

Castiel: Toothless would kill your sorry ass

~***~

Regina George,

Oh my god, you’re so fetch.

Sorry Cas, I don’t know why, but I really felt like I had to change our theme to Mean Girls. Sue me. (Also, you better have fucking watched Mean Girls, or there will be hell to pay.)

So, my friend Charlie talked me into this, but I guess I kind of agreed with her that I ought to do it. And you can totally say no thanks, not interested, and it’ll be completely fine! But, I was wondering if maybe you’d be interesting in going on a date with me sometime…?

Wow, I am a child. Well, a teenage girl, to be precise. Oh shit, and you keep telling me you’re not a pedophile, so you’re definitely not going to want to go out with me now that you know my true identity. Well this is a fine mess I’ve gotten myself into.

Have you sold that car yet? You should really get on that.

Yours forever,

Amy Poehler

~***~

Mother,

Of course I’ve seen Mean Girls, I’m not that out of the proverbial loop.

And would you please thank your friend Charlie for me? I’ll admit, I’ve wanted to go on a date with you for a quite a while now, but ye ole’ social ineptitude wouldn’t let me ask. Maybe text me when you get this, and we can work out a time/place? Saturday nights are usually best for me, considering I’m always off Sundays.

Please Dean, if you’re a teenage girl, then I am too, and then it’s not pedophilia.

And no, I haven’t sold it yet, because I haven’t decided on a new one to buy yet, because in case you hadn’t noticed, my life has been a little hectic lately. I’ll try and text you the details on the car I’m looking at soon, though.

Fours yorever,

Reginers

~***~

Saturday night is there before Dean can get his shit together. He had frantically texted Charlie minutes after making the date with Cas asking her what he should wear and how he should act and whether he should just run away and never come back. You know, normal stuff.

In the end, he and Cas had decided on meeting an a small burger place near Cas’ place, so Dean knew he shouldn’t wear something too fancy. But he didn’t want to wear just his every minute of every day bluejeans, t-shirt, and flannel combo. So, with some sagely advice from Charlie, he’s decided on his most flattering pair of grey jeans and a button down maroon shirt, freshly ironed. Honestly, not half bad, even by his self-degrading standards. He toyed with the idea of a grey tie with the top two buttons of his collar undone, and decided it was too snazzy for him to refuse.

A 15-minute drive later, he was walking into the restaurant and looking around for Cas. And boy, did he find him. Cas was wearing a tight pair of black jeans, an Egyptian blue button down, and a black waistcoat, and holy fuck, Dean was having another southward situation just at the sight. He repeated the words ‘puss, flesh, old-people skin,’ in his head for half a minute until everything was hunky dory again, then made his way to the bar where Cas was standing.

“You look great, Cas.” Dean grinned when he saw Cas blatantly checking his ass. The good old grey jeans never fail.

“As do you, Dean,” Cas responded, his pupils mildly larger than probably normal.

They made their way over to a small corner booth and waived down a waitress. Adorably enough, they both ordered the same bacon cheeseburger, and in the time it took for their food to arrive, they discussed possible future heart health and how they were both going to die eventually, so it might as well be from eating delicious food.

“Dude, if bacon’s what gets me, I win,” Dean remarked right before taking a huge bite into his burger.

Cas harrumphed in agreement, then moaned around the first bite of his own burger.

Uh oh. Turned out, visual Cas is nothing compared to audible Cas in terms of making Dean’s nether regions all kinds of interested. To put it simply, Dean was sitting at a booth, on a first date, a burger in his mouth, almost completely hard. Awesome.

“Dean, are you okay?” Shit, Cas apparently noticed the panicked look on Dean’s face, and Dean’s face burned red.

“Um, yeah, I’m fine. I, um, just kinda have a little… situation. Downstairs. God this is so embarrassing; I’m soooooo, so sorry. Please don’t hate me.”

Cas was quiet for a second, then burst out with infectious laughter, and Dean couldn’t help but join in. “Oh my god, that’s hilarious. Was it become of the groan I just made or…?”

Dean ran a hand through his hair before responding, “Um, yeah. Fuck. Look, I haven’t gotten

laid in close to three months, so cut me a little slack. And honestly, I’m really sorry. I wanted this

to be a really special first date, but I feel like I kind of ruined it.” Like Dean ruined everything.

“Oh, no no no! Really, I understand much better than you’d think,” Cas assuaged his fear and sorrow with a comforting pat on the back on the hand. “It’s honestly fine. Now, do you need to go to take a trip to the bathroom, or are you all right now?”

Dean informed Cas that apparently humiliation was not one of his kinks, and the situation had resolved itself, and they were able to go on with their dinner like it had never happened.

But you know, it did happen, and Dean hadn’t had sex in months, and Cas was the hottest date Dean had ever had. SO yeah. Things happen.

~***~

After an amazing evening of burgers, pie, beer, and literal hours of conversation, they decided it was definitely time for them to part ways. Cas had walked to the restaurant, so Dean offered to drop him off on his way home, and Cas gratefully accepted.

The car ride was normal, if slightly tense. They were both slightly buzzed and totally attracted to each other, after all. But it was chill.

Dean pulled up to Cas’ home, a cozy-looking apartment complex, and parked his car in one of the visitor spots. They both climbed out and walked together up to Cas’ door.

“So, I had an awesome time tonight,” Dean half-mumbled, really trying his best to appear like he wasn’t desperate to go out with Cas again as soon as possible. “You think you might want to do this again sometime? I mean, really, I totally get it if like I’m not your type or you’re just not into me or you think I’m too--”

Cas slammed their faces (particularly their lips) together, effectively cutting off Dean’s self-abusive train of thought and filling his mind with only the pure bliss of Cas’ warm mouth on his, their tongues fighting for dominance. Cas’ mouth tasted amazing, like apple pie and happiness. Dean hungrily chased the flavour, and he couldn’t get enough. They broke for air for just a minute before Cas wheeled Dean around and up against his apartment door, weaving one hand into his hair and grabbing Dean’s own hand with the other, pinning it up against the door above his head.

Dean had never felt less in control, and it was amazing. He could feel the strength in Cas’ body shoved up against his own. He felt vulnerable, but for once in his life, he was okay with that vulnerability.

Cas moved his mouth down from Dean’s mouth to his neck, peppering the skin with hot, wet kisses. He settled on one spot, the meaty place between Dean’s neck and right shoulder and assaulted it with licks, kisses, nibbles, and sucks. He was driving Dean crazy, and Dean honestly couldn’t stop himself from moaning out, “Uhhhh, Cas…”

Maybe it was something about how he broke the silence, but Cas suddenly stilled and looked up at Dean, alarm filling his eyes. “Oh my god, Dean, I’m sorry. I’ve never done this before; I don’t know what came over me.” He stepped back from Dean and rubbed his hands over his face.

“What? Why’d you stop?” Dean replied, feeling suddenly abandoned.

Cas locked eyes with Dean and said very seriously, “I have no idea what I’m doing, Dean. I’ve never had sex; hell, I’ve never been in a relationship that lasted longer than a week. And you’re this amazing, attractive man who has had so much sex and knows all about it, and I’m just going to embarrass myself and it’ll be terrible and--”

This time, Dean satisfies the cliche, cutting off Cas’ river of doubts with a kiss into which he poured all the words he wanted to say but didn’t know how: that Cas made him feel safe and comfortable and like he could be himself and still feel appreciated and cared for and special and important.

Cas seemed to get the message, and he quickly took control once again, holding Dean tight in his arms and kissing him with more passion than is in an entire episode of Casa Erotica.

Dean had been hard for a while now, and as Cas clung to him, he could feel that Cas was in about the same spot as he was. But shit, if Cas was a virgin, that would put a lot of weight on Dean’s shoulders, right? He wanted to make it perfect for Cas, because that’s what Cas deserved.

But apparently, Cas had a completely different idea. He pulled away from Dean, and with his pupils completely blown wide and dark, moved his mouth to Dean’s ear and whispered, “I’m going to make you feel so good.”

Huh, well, Dean realized at that moment he was completely, 100%, no doubt about it, a bottom. And apparently, Cas’ self-confidence boosted itself threefold when he was horny, so yeah. That was pretty sweet.

Cas fumbled with his apartment keys and opened the front door before pushing Dean inside and slamming the door behind them. He kiss-walked (that thing where people are joined at the mouth but still manage to move around, that’s honestly kind of impressive if you think about it) Dean to what Dean assumed could only be his bedroom and shoved him onto the bed before climbing on top of waist and resuming kissing him like a man dying of dehydration and Dean’s mouth was a fucking water fountain.

Without breaking their lip lock, Cas scrambled to get Dean’s tie off, and Dean did his best to help with the clothing removal process, but his efforts were mostly futile.

Finally, after a  pathetically long and unromantic struggle, they were both naked, and Dean was basically drooling at the sight of Cas’ dick. Like, holy hell, it’s not like Dean himself was small, but Jesus, he was embarrassed of his own length in the presence of Cas’ massiveness.

Cas grinned with a hungry look in his eye as he took Dean in, and Dean felt suddenly self conscious as Cas scanned him so carefully.

Cas noticed the change in Dean’s demeanor and guessed the source quickly. “Dean, you are so beautiful,” his husky voice reassured before leaning in and capturing Dean’s lips once again, this time with a contrastingly gentle and loving kiss, and for once in his life, Dean let himself actually believe that about himself.

The kiss soon got more heated, and Cas’ hands began exploring Dean’s body, starting in his hair, traveling down his chest, over his hips, and down his thighs. Dean moaned and realized that, much to his embarrassment, he was actually close.

Fortunately, Cas seemed to sense he should advance things, and he trailed his hands back up to Dean’s throbbing cock. Dean let out a punched groan at the first touch to his hot member, squeezed his eyes shut tight, and clenched his fists behind Cas’ back. “So good, Cas…”

Cas’ hand left his cock for a minute, and Dean heard the telltale sounds of someone spitting before the hand returned, slick and tight. Just a couple tugs and Dean was coming with a shout. “Oh, Cas, oh fuck, Cas!”

He had never come so quickly in his entire life, but Dean couldn’t even find it in himself to be ashamed, especially as he heard Cas grunting as he followed directly behind him.

“Cas, that was…”

A sudden worried look fell over Cas’ face. “Was it bad? I’m sorry, I know we both came really fast.”

Dean laughed and tried his best kiss the pouting look off of Cas. “No, it was amazing, Cas. Jesus, that was the most vanilla shit I’ve ever done, but it was perfect.” Dean sighed and steeled himself before continuing. “And actually, I think the reason it was perfect was because, well, it was with you, Cas.”

~***~

“Honeybee, I’m home!” Dean stripped off his big winter coat and hung it on the hook by the front door.

“I’m in the kitchen, Dean!” Dean stalked through the house and up behind his husband, snaking his arms around the other man’s broad chest and leaning over his shoulder to give him a peck on the cheek.

“How was work today?” Dean asked, glancing around the kitchen and noticing with a grin what looked suspiciously like the mess left after someone has baked an apple pie.

“Work was lovely, thank you. Of course, that was mostly because of the letter I got from my favorite stop on my favorite route.” Cas grinned and spun around to give Dean a proper kiss.

“I’m your favorite?!” Dean grinned and pulled back before Cas could kiss him

Cas rolled his eyes, “No, I’m talking about our neighbor, Mrs. Tran.”

“I love you too, babe.” Dean finally let himself be pulled into his husband’s eager arms and smiled into the kiss. Fate was kind of awesome.  

[sitaaronkepaar]

Daily Rikara Ramblings

Gosh, I have no idea what to expect today. Low-key afraid to watch cause Omkara's a disappointment but then Shrenu's here to grace my screen after what seems like 2000 years, and how can I even dare not watch her? Impossible!

OMG SHRENU I MISSED YOU SO MUCH. 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖NEVER LEAVE ME AGAIN *hugs her legs* 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

But cutie you still don't look a 100%. Take your time boo. 😘😘😘😘

So glad they're using Maa ka excuse. I legit thought they'd make some dumbass excuse here. Chalo, thank god. 😌😌😌😌😌😌😌

Oh no, yahan she's missing him and wahan he channeled Darr's Rahul and burnt all her paintings/pictures in his freepy dungeon. She gon be heart broken. 💔💔💔💔💔💔 I can't watch this. 😧😧😧😧😧

Aww, she wants do new shuruat but yahan toh he bhasmofied their entire relationship 😧😧 😢😢😢😢😢

She loves him now? Ok, i guess. 😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐

God, yeh toh pehle se hi AngryKara mode me hai. 😥😥😥😥

Fuck he cut her call. Ugh. 😒😒😒😒

Shit man, this is going to be a trainwreck and i just can't stop looking. 😫😫😫😫😫😫😫

Ugh, Omkara. Just ugh. 😒😒😒😒

I'm just tolerating you now cuz I know tu khoon k aasun rone wala hai. 😇😇😇😇😇😇

Omg bhavya in her hair tied up!! Yay!! 😘😘😘😘😘

Waise protocol says bun, but PROGRESS BITCHESSS!!

Ugh, the bribe's gon be in that mithai ka dabba isn't it?

Ugh, yes it is. 😥😥

Shit poor bhavya.😢😢😢 Who's phasaoing her?

Sultan? 🤔

Haadsa, Raaz, kya bakwas hai 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

Ffwd🙄🙄🙄

She's reached home. Oh no, muje heart attack aa raha hai. 😧😧😧😥😥😥

Omfg how much weight has Shrenu lost? Iska suit bhi dheela ho gya hai. 😧 Girl, REST! 😧😧😧

Ugh, Arjun. I guess we're never going to know why he went to that cheapass hotel. Just another raaz i guess. 😒😒😒

Card? Hahahahhaha, i was right!! So it was a card she tore off. Ahem ahem. 😎😎😎😎😎😎

Why do I feel Omkara's gonna overhear all the wrong things? 😓😓😓

For fucks sake Gauri pls don't say ILY on phone. Tera pati galat fahmi ki dukaan hai. You KNOW he will overhear this shit!! 😧😧😧

FUCK NO HE HEARD HER I LOVE YOU. FUCK THIS SUCKS. UGHHHH

Hahaha, but muje Omkara ko dekh k itni hassi aa rahi hai lol. Jo kehna hai keh le beta, i don't even care cuz you gon cry soon bitch 😉😉😉😏😏😏😏

Poor Bhavya. Ek din proper uniform me aayi and usi din suspend ho gayi. 😢😢😢

This I love you, shy love you is making me lol but more on that later lmaoooo.

Ofc, this he didn't overhear. 🙄🙄🙄Jo nahi sun na tha woh dasve maale se bhi sun leta. But kaam ki baat uske sar pe khade hoke bhi sunai nahi degi 😑😑😑😑😑😑

Aww, i know he's faking but this hug is still giving me feels. At least it's better than Gauri dreaming again. Or is it? 🤔🤔🤔

Gauri's face when he hugs her is so....😍😭😭😭😭😭

OH NO.!!! HE LOOKS LIKE A FUCKING PSYCHO. DAFUQ ARE THOSE RED EYES??

Has Gauri's absence made him relapse? Is he taking drugs again??? 😱😱😱😱

DEAR GOD IT'S SCARY!!!! 😧😧😧😧😧😧

I was joking before but Omkara, have you seen Darr one too many times kya? Stop this, you're scaring me. 😧😧😧😧😧

Fuck this is going to lead to so much bezaati lol. I can't watch this. 🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈

Ugh, i hope you end this relationship bitch tab pata chalega tujhe. I really hope Gauri gives it back to you bitchhhhh!!! 😠😠😠

Also, Dafuq is this Love shuv crap? Abhi theek se MU's bhi clear nahi hui, friendship bhi nahi hui, he hasn't even properly apologized and made up for his actions and you're in love? Bitch, he doesn't even recognize your marriage!!! Or trust you, or respect you(granted you don't know that but still!! I thought you could read people Gauri!). You're just going to break your own heart going this path Gauri, and no one's gonna be able to console you cause this was your own doing.

And lol cvs k charan kaha hai? Aarti utar ke, mala pehnane ka mann kar raha hai by goddd!! How many times are you going to show you don't give a fuck about Rikara? Ek toh this circle of hell of a relationship is full of misunderstandings, usko properly resolve karne k bajai, you bring up more nonsense, and add more misunderstandings, and instead of showing real progress, you just reboot them every single time they are on the verge of an understanding. The dangal track was so wonderful, but no, you just nullified it all. And now Gauri's in love? Why? Just why is she in love with someone who's only made her miserable all these months? Cuz shankarji ka Prasad? Like, why the rush, bruh!! 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

You know what though, I don't even care. After that tucchi mu clearing or whatever it was, I legit don't give a damn. At least after this shit is over, maybe we'll get some tharki scenes? God, these peeps toh don't even hug. That's why Omkara's psycho hug also gave me feels. Kuch toh tharak satisfy ho.😥😥😥😥😥😥